The Sun and The Rainbow

SOME MISUNDERSTANDINGS

ABOUT THE ASHRAM

A LETTER

There are several misunderstandings about the Ashram, which I would like to clear up. First of all, take the ideal here and the life we lead. The impression you have received from what you call X's interpretation of Sri Aurobindo is quite wrong. You have come to believe that a society based on Yoga "is built on self love". The truth is that it is precisely self love in all its subtle no less than gross ramifications that the life of Yoga is meant to free us from. We distinguish two sides of our self: the so-called normal personality which is distinct from every other person, and the inner being which is an individual expression of the one divine Self in all and so is in spontaneous sympathy with all beings and all things. The first side we call "ego". We do not mean merely that part of us which is openly egoistic or selfish. We also mean whatever in us does things from the limited personal consciousness that we ordinarily are: even acts, which look as if they were unselfish and social-minded and altruistic, really stem from the same restricted human unit. If a philanthropist finds that the people he wants to help with his money or personal service are ungrateful or misuse his "benevolence", he is angry and outraged or else despondent and pessimistic. This reaction which you might consider quite natural is from our point of view a sign that behind the philanthropy there is still the small, divided, individualistic self at work.

Unlike the "ego", the "soul" would be completely serene

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and have no personal reactions. All that it does is inwardly dedicated to the Divine and it is itself free from all self-regarding reactions. A certain wide equanimity (which means a lot of difficult self-exceeding as well as self-control) and a certain constant remembering of That which is one in all and also greater than all is sought to be practised at every moment if possible. Always a guidance from beyond ourselves is prayed for and there is a definite endeavour to shift our poise from the outer being to the inmost — what in Christian mystical parlance is known as "the practice of the presence of God". We make no show of religiosity, we follow no ostentatious ritualism, but we try to live from a non-egoistic depth in ourselves. We do not look down upon what you have called "brotherly love". Ideals of fraternity, like those of liberty and equality, are very good, and surely they reflect something of what we may term the Divine Consciousness. But as long as we live in our surface being, however refined and well-intentioned it may be, and as long we do not make a constant methodised effort to go beyond it, we shall see that human society remains full of personal tugs of war, a play of open or concealed self-interests. "Brotherly love" which was preached from thousands of years ago has not made any true difference to man's life.

You will say it has not been really practised. Do you mean to imply that nobody in the past centuries ever thought of practising it? There have always been well-intentioned people who have thought in terms of it and striven to cultivate it. But whatever small successes it may have had, in a few private circles and for a little while, have been upset and nullified by the activities of unregenerate manhood. The need is to make a lifelong drive towards discovering the psychic self deep within us and then to live from it. This is an arduous task and not something which can be accused of self-indulgence and self-centredness: It is exactly the opposite and therefore there are so few who lead the mystical life and do Yoga. Of course, there is always the possibility of misconstruing what one genuinely sets out to do. That is what seems to have happened

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with  X, so that you got the impression that he was moving away from "brotherly love". But I can assure you that the real picture of the Yogic life is quite different.

Now 1 come to some immediate practical problems. When people make an effort to do Yoga, and especially a Yoga like Sri Aurobindo's whose ultimate aim is not to pass into a beatific beyond (whether the Vedantic Liberation, the Buddhist Nirvana, the Vaishnava Bliss-world, the Zoroastrian or Christian Heaven, the Muslim Paradise), there has to be an organised collective life with a certain minimum of rules. An extreme tolerance is attempted because human beings are so various. Sri Aurobindo and the Mother have tried to give the utmost liberty to their disciples so that each one's special trend of being may be respected. As the very word "Mother" connotes, there has to be an abundance of understanding and forbearance. People are not dealt with in a strictly legalistic way. Stumblings are expected and there is always an eagerness to help one get back on one's feet and start moving. However, there comes a time when things go beyond the limit and steps have to be taken for the sake both of the stumbling person and the group in which he lives. Everything possible is always done to give a person the chance to carry on here. Only when he shows no capacity to take advantage of the tolerance and freedom allowed, the Ashram has to decide upon the definite course of sending him away. You seem to think that it is only fits of anger and tantrums that are involved. Surely a system of Yoga which tries to change human nature is full of understanding of human failings. The Ashram would never think of sending anyone out for anything short of dangerous violence.

You have yourself said in your letter that you and the society based on "brotherly love" can deal with X in a welcoming way only if it is the "old X" or else a mixture of the old and the new but not at all if you have altogether the "new X" on your hands. You say that if X has chosen definitely a certain line of life he must fend for himself. Of course you would

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try to let him have whatever help is possible in making him go his own way. Obviously, you set a limit to tolerance but would also attempt to act as kindly and constructively as you can. Similarly the Ashram, after a good deal of thought and watching, would try to help a person get beyond the inner spiritual pressures of the yogic life and recover his or her balance in a different atmosphere elsewhere, with whatever means, psychiatric or any other, available. Certain kinds of behaviour compel the Ashram to take defensive steps which are at the same time beneficial to the parry concerned. Surely, there should be nothing here for you to criticise.

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