A collection of letters, poems & paintings by Janina providing a glimpse of her inner life in 'Sri Aurobindo Ashram'. The Mother's comment on Janina is included.
This book is a collection of letters, poems and paintings by Janina Stroka, a Polish disciple of Sri Aurobindo and the Mother and a member of the Sri Aurobindo Ashram in Pondicherry, India, from 1957 until her passing in 1964. Janina’s account of her life in Pondicherry in this book is divided into three parts. The main part of the text consists of extracts from letters written to a Dutch friend with whom Janina lived first in Palestine and later in Germany, from December 1957 to June 1958. The letters in the next section were written between 1960 and 1963 to a young Bengali, a writer and social worker. Next, the book contains selected poems and paintings by Janina and concludes with a comment by the Mother on Janina’s passing.
6.4.1958
The divine child cannot go back to the Father with empty hands - and nothing less than all will do. Now I really feel it. Every movement, even the tiniest, belongs to Her and I just go on, first stating and beginning to feel that each thought, feeling, action in me is Hers and then immediately giving it, offering it to Her. And all this She is doing in me, She Herself. I feel like smiling at everything and everybody, as if I were living in a new world and I aspire for my birthright to be realised - realised fully - and to become Herself in all my being. And as it is She who aspires in me, it will become a reality.... Let me know if you have got the Bulletin issue of 1956. There are a number of very inspiring talks by the Mother. I often go to our beautiful library, sit on a big veranda with a view of the sea, in the shade of course, and read these old issues. It is as if She is actually instructing me. It really is so. Often I feel Her order to get up and leave everything at the Nursing Home and go to the library and read. This is more than reading. The August 1957 Bulletin has helped me today a lot. And often the part I have to read is "given to me" with the omission of other talks. My inner contact grows into a greater and greater intimacy. How could it be different? The time will come when my aspiration is so strong that nothing, nothing else will matter... I firmly believe that all these changes in me are the result of the working of the Supermind in matter. It is easier and quicker since 1956 and I feel that I am allowed to stop for a moment. I never look back, but walk forward and forward and in this walking She gives me rest. I call Her my eternal holiday. All my life I have been longing for such repose and now- since the worst burden, the mind, has lost its supremacy over me - I just feel as if I am being carried in Her arms.
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