It's neither life nor death.. BOTH are being changed.. into something still unknown.. dangerous and wonderful. On Nov 17, 1973, she left her body - why?
"Before dying falsehood rises in full swing. Still people understand only the lesson of catastrophe. Will it have to come before they open their eyes?" This is the year of Watergate, of Nixon's first trip to China, the assassination of the Israeli athletes in Munich, the first oil embargo. This is Mother's last lap. A lap strewn with heartrending little cries and stunning visions. The end of one world, the beginning of another.... whether we want it or not. "Sometimes, it is so new and unexpected, it's almost painful." And I would ask her, "But is it a state outside matter?" "I don't go outside of physical life, but.... it looks different. But it is strange. And it is PHYSICAL, that is the extraordinary thing! As if the physical had split in two.... A new state in matter. And it is ruled by something that is not the sun, I don't know what it is.... I am touching another world. Another way of being.... dangerous but wonderful." How I listened to her little breath as she gasped for air, a breath that seemed to come from another side of the world: "There is no difference between life and death. It's neither life nor death, it is.... something. It is not the disappearance of death you understand: BOTH are being changed.... into something still unknown, which seems at once extremely dangerous and absolutely wonderful." And what if "death" were merely the other, MATERIAL side of our human bowl, the sunlit shore for a species to come? A new condition on both sides of the world, in which life and death change into.... something else? "I am treading a very thin and narrow line...." And then this cry, this entreaty: "Let me do the work!" On November 17, 1973, she passed away - why?
I am always late!... I think we should fix ten-thirty [instead of ten o'clock].
Well, if you say ten-thirty, it'll mean eleven! (laughter)
Yes, yes! (Mother gives Satprem a little tap on the shoulder.)
What do you say?
Well, I say that Mother doesn't talk much!
Page 221
(silence)
Before, you... you talked more readily.
Yes.
(long silence)
I have a feeling I am becoming another person.
No, not just that: I am entering ANOTHER world, another way of being... which might be called a dangerous way of being (in terms of the ordinary consciousness). As if....
Dangerous, but wonderful—how to express it?
First, the [body's] subconscient is in the process of changing, and that is long, arduous and painful... but marvelous as well. The feeling of... (gesture as if standing on a ridge).
More and more, the body's sensation is that faith alone can save—knowledge is not yet possible, so only faith can save.
But "faith can save" still sounds like an old manner of speaking.... How to phrase it?... The feeling that the relation between what we call "life" and what we call "death" is becoming more and more different—yes, different (Mother nods her head), completely different.
Not that death disappears, mind you (death as we see it, as we know it and in relation to life as we know it): that's not it, not it at all. BOTH are changing... into something we don't yet know, which seems at once extremely dangerous and absolutely marvelous. Dangerous: the least mistake has catastrophic consequences. And marvelous.
It is the consciousness, the true consciousness of immortality—not "immortality" as we understand it, something else. Something else.
Our natural tendency is to want certain things to be true (those we deem favorable) and other things to disappear—but that's not it! It isn't like that. EVERYTHING is different.
Different.
From time to time, for a moment (a brief moment): a marvel. But the very next minute: the feeling of... a dangerous unknown. There you are. That's how I spend my time.
The subconscient is full of, oh, full of fears, of anxieties, of....
Page 222
That place is disgusting (gesture rising from below).
The body doesn't even have faith in its own faith! That's right: it feels its faith isn't the real thing, it doesn't have faith in its own faith.
Life... life used to be simpler with that faith that predominated over all else, but now... (gesture of a complete collapse).
(Mother plunges in)
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