It's neither life nor death.. BOTH are being changed.. into something still unknown.. dangerous and wonderful. On Nov 17, 1973, she left her body - why?
"Before dying falsehood rises in full swing. Still people understand only the lesson of catastrophe. Will it have to come before they open their eyes?" This is the year of Watergate, of Nixon's first trip to China, the assassination of the Israeli athletes in Munich, the first oil embargo. This is Mother's last lap. A lap strewn with heartrending little cries and stunning visions. The end of one world, the beginning of another.... whether we want it or not. "Sometimes, it is so new and unexpected, it's almost painful." And I would ask her, "But is it a state outside matter?" "I don't go outside of physical life, but.... it looks different. But it is strange. And it is PHYSICAL, that is the extraordinary thing! As if the physical had split in two.... A new state in matter. And it is ruled by something that is not the sun, I don't know what it is.... I am touching another world. Another way of being.... dangerous but wonderful." How I listened to her little breath as she gasped for air, a breath that seemed to come from another side of the world: "There is no difference between life and death. It's neither life nor death, it is.... something. It is not the disappearance of death you understand: BOTH are being changed.... into something still unknown, which seems at once extremely dangerous and absolutely wonderful." And what if "death" were merely the other, MATERIAL side of our human bowl, the sunlit shore for a species to come? A new condition on both sides of the world, in which life and death change into.... something else? "I am treading a very thin and narrow line...." And then this cry, this entreaty: "Let me do the work!" On November 17, 1973, she passed away - why?
Constantly, but constantly, I have things I would like you to know, but I don't have a chance to tell them. The ordinary memory is all gone, do you know, so if it comes, it comes; if it doesn't come... it's just lost.
Really... fantastic things.
(silence)
As if I were walking on a very thin and narrow line: on one side, imbecility, and on the other genius! That's how I progress (gesture of standing on a ridge).
What does it depend on? I have no idea.
All the old methods are obsolete, but the new ones aren't yet established. Although sometimes, they come all of a sudden: for a few minutes, there's a dazzling flood of light... something marvelous, the feeling of a power over the entire world. And the next minute, all gone.
Night and day, like that.
Sometimes, for no apparent reason, I am in such a horrible discomfort, I feel it must lead to death, but then... something says, "Don't mind," as though Sri Aurobindo were watching over me — don't mind, don't mind.... So I... (Mother opens her hands). And after a little while: gone, it's inexplicably gone.
I can't eat anymore—oh, it's so difficult! So difficult. Eating is really the most difficult of all.... I am not really disgusted by food, nothing of the sort, but I just can't put it in my mouth. I can still drink... for the moment.
There's nothing there, nothing (pointing to her forehead), it's empty, empty, thoroughly empty.... And when I remain like this....
(Mother goes into contemplation)
Page 203
Home
The Mother
Books
Agenda
Share your feedback. Help us improve. Or ask a question.