Dyuman's Correspondence with The Mother

25 December 1933

My dear Mother,

There is no peace and happiness in my being. What has happened to me? It was seven years ago, when I was in the hospital, that I took the final decision: I am here to live at the Feet of Sri Aurobindo; it is my only life.

Today there is a great struggle in me. I hope it will not lead to misery, trouble, peril and difficulty. My body falls down as if it is dying. Mother, my heart is completely broken today.

What has happened? I am anxious and want to know. Anything wrong physically? Of which heart are you speaking? and why? Is there any exterior cause for that? My love is anxious and wants to know all about it.

25 December 1933