Starts the terrible years.The change is DONE: a new mode of being of the cellular consciousness has appeared on earth. The future awaits - will the 'old' yield?
The beginning of the terrible years.... There was the feeling that Mother had found the secret of the change, conquered all she could from her own body, and that she was now sitting there, surrounded by the pack, just putting up with each and every resistance of the old species. "The change is DONE. Everything is tooth and nail, ferociously after me, but it's over." A new mode of being of the cellular consciousness had appeared on earth, as one day, in inert matter, there appeared a new mode of being called life - but this time it is "overlife": "The impression there is a way of being of the cells that would be the beginning of a new body; only, when that comes, the body itself feels it is dying." What would be the feeling of the first corpuscle to experience life? "The body feels it has reached the point of.... unknown. A very, very strange sensation. A sort of new vibration. It's so new that.... I can't speak of anguish, but it's.... the unknown. A mystery of the unknown." And there, what we call death is like the other side of the bowl for the former fish, and yet it is not "another world": "They are surprisingly one within the other! There is something there.... Is it possible? For overlife is both life and death together." And then, this cry of the breakthrough: "What appears to us as 'the laws of nature' is nonsense!...." Another world ON EARTH in which the old mortal laws of our bowl break down.... into something else? "I have just had a fantastic vision of the cradle of a future.... which is not very far. It's like a formidable mass suspended above the earth." But will the old pack let her go through to the end?
(Mother's voice is quite husky.)
No voice.... But it doesn't matter.... Can you hear me?...
If you have questions, you can ask them.
Things feel as if they're grating and difficult.
Yes, yes.
(long contemplation)
I can remain like this twenty-four hours a day.
Eating has become a problem....
(silence)
Page 193
Sometimes one catches a glimpse of the heroism it takes to do the work you're doing....
(Mother laughs) The body is enduring enough, I can't complain.
If there were a certitude, if, for instance, Sri Aurobindo said, "This and this and this is like this," then it would be very easy! But what's difficult is... You see, you are surrounded by people who think you're ill and treat you as such, while you know you're not ill. But everything, everything is shattered... disrupted.
Now and then, rarely—rarely—now and then there is bliss all of a sudden. It lasts a few seconds. Maybe that's actually the way to tell me, "This is how the end will be"? But you are surrounded by a certainty that you're fast moving towards the end, so this poor body is like this (wobbly gesture). It isn't concerned with it, but it doesn't have a certitude of how it will end. So all it can do is to be tranquil, trusting, and... endure.
(long silence)
I had a bizarre dream the other day.
Oh?
Two nights ago, shortly before dawn, I was with you and you were "outside." We seemed to be walking together, I was walking with you in a street. It was outdoors. Then you told me, "But why don't you ask me questions about the outside world?" Then you started talking about China, and you said, if I understood well, that China was going to... sweep over the world.
Bah!
I don't know what that means. But it was outdoors. And one detail, for example: I tape-recorded what you said, and I realized there was in the distance the old machine we used when you were downstairs. I don't know if this detail means anything.... We were in a street, walking together; I walked by your side.
Then you spoke about Africa, Madagascar.... In any case, you said to me (if I understood correctly, if it's clear): China is going to sweep over the world.
Page 194
Bah-bah-bah.... That's not amusing!
They're very scared of China here, to the point that many people want to make atom bombs; so in desperation, they asked me (the government asked me), "What should we do?..."—I was the last person they should have asked!
It's a means of intimidation, but... China has it, Russia has it, France has it (Mother covers her eyes with her hand when mentioning France), horrible!...
I don't know if it's China or America, they have one bomb that's enough to destroy the whole of Paris.
Yes, certainly!
(Mother sweeps her hand across her forehead long silence)
Do you have anything else?
(Sujata slips a note into Satprem's hand)
Sujata asks a question. She says: "If India called the Divine, would it not be a more effective way of stopping China?"
Un-de-ni-a-bly! (Mother laughs) Undeniably.
They don't have faith!
(Mother goes into a contemplation)
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