Others too had to understand Her secret - her own disciples, Nations. Will she be heard? Will she be allowed to pursue her experience? '... The body knows that the work will go on and on and on...'
The last turning point of Mother's yoga, and she comes out of it with this cry: "I have walked a long, long time. There was nothing but a constant cry, as if everything were torn away from me. It was the whole problem of the world." And this Agenda is more and more strewn with heartrending little cries. It was not enough to have found the secret for herself, the others too had to understand, her own disciples, Nations locked in their egoistic power: "They have no faith! 'She is old, she is old', an atmosphere of resistance to the change; 'it is impossible, impossible' from all sides.... Not a single minute should be wasted - I am in a hurry.... The reign of the Divine must, oh, must come!.... If the entire Russian block were to turn to the right side, that would be an enormous support! The victory is certain, but I don't know which path will be followed to reach it.... We must cling, cling so tightly to Truth.... They don't listen to me any more." She is 93, groping her way into the unknown: "I see more clearly with eyes closed than with eyes open, and it is a physical vision, purely physical, but a kind of physical that seems more complete. The consciousness of the cells is what has to change, all the rest will follow naturally! I have the feeling I am on my way to discovering the illusion that must be destroyed so that physical life may go on uninterrupted - death is the result of a distortion of consciousness." Will she be heard? Will she be allowed to pursue her experience? "Only a violent death could halt the transformation; otherwise the body knows that the work will go on and on and on...." And this cry again: "There will be a miracle! But what, I don't know."
There's a dreadful confusion, everyone is quarreling.... Before, at least, Indira and N.S. got along with one another, but now.... Indira has sent word through the governor that if I had something to tell her, I should do so through him—I have nothing to say.
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We're receiving letters from all over with the "true knowledge" of what should be done according to Sri Aurobindo, and.... There's such a mixture, things are all scrambled, oh!...
It is Falsehood putting a mantle of truth in order to appear credible.
The two of them don't get along anymore because Indira says that I told her one thing, while N.S. says, "No, Mother said that." That's where we are.1
Well, you should say exactly what you said!
Yes, but each interprets it in her own way!...
On the one hand, they say that the war is imminent; on the other hand, war is useless—all that supported by what I am supposed to have said.
Well, anyway....
Why couldn't you have Indira read my article [on Bangladesh]?
But I believe somebody had her read it.
That would very much surprise me.... Have it sent through J. [the governor]!
(after a silence, Mother shakes her head)
They've missed the moment. They've lost the chance.
Yes, that's what I think too.
(long silence)
Can you imagine that along with the refugees, some Pakistanis have entered India, and they have poisoned wells and rivers. Some of them were caught in the act. It's dreadful....
But they get exactly what they deserve! They want to be like holy little saints, and not interfere nor do anything. So, it results in millions of refugees, their wells get poisoned and everything gets worse. They are shrinking from making war, you see!
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(Mother goes within for a long time)
Parliament seems to be in favor of war—Parliament wants war, but it's the government that doesn't want.
Yes.
(Mother goes back within)
But the disease is infecting the whole world. There's an American who had come here and she was supposed to come back; she was stabbed at night on her way home—in New York. It seems that you can't go out at night in New York, unless there are three or four people together.... The world has gone mad—everywhere.
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