Others too had to understand Her secret - her own disciples, Nations. Will she be heard? Will she be allowed to pursue her experience? '... The body knows that the work will go on and on and on...'
The last turning point of Mother's yoga, and she comes out of it with this cry: "I have walked a long, long time. There was nothing but a constant cry, as if everything were torn away from me. It was the whole problem of the world." And this Agenda is more and more strewn with heartrending little cries. It was not enough to have found the secret for herself, the others too had to understand, her own disciples, Nations locked in their egoistic power: "They have no faith! 'She is old, she is old', an atmosphere of resistance to the change; 'it is impossible, impossible' from all sides.... Not a single minute should be wasted - I am in a hurry.... The reign of the Divine must, oh, must come!.... If the entire Russian block were to turn to the right side, that would be an enormous support! The victory is certain, but I don't know which path will be followed to reach it.... We must cling, cling so tightly to Truth.... They don't listen to me any more." She is 93, groping her way into the unknown: "I see more clearly with eyes closed than with eyes open, and it is a physical vision, purely physical, but a kind of physical that seems more complete. The consciousness of the cells is what has to change, all the rest will follow naturally! I have the feeling I am on my way to discovering the illusion that must be destroyed so that physical life may go on uninterrupted - death is the result of a distortion of consciousness." Will she be heard? Will she be allowed to pursue her experience? "Only a violent death could halt the transformation; otherwise the body knows that the work will go on and on and on...." And this cry again: "There will be a miracle! But what, I don't know."
You have nothing to say, no news?
No, Mother. How are things?
(after a silence)
You know, I have the impression that the body... since it wants to progress fast, is literally whipped into moving ahead. But that's entirely personal... I am not complaining.
It's of no interest to others.
It's as if there were a constant ringing directed to the body (Mother makes a gesture of hammering): "You say you want to live only for the Divine—so live only for the Divine, live only..." (same gesture of hammering).
And so it sees how much it still belongs to this old world.
But anyway it's all right.
(long silence)
We're right in the midst of the transition—for everything. And how long is the transition going to last? I don't know.... I have the feeling things are going as fast as they can, that if they were any faster, everything would break.
And you?
I feel I am witnessing a whole display of the subconscient and the lower nature....
(Mother nods her head)
Terrible.
Yes, it's resisting as much as it can.
Oh, but it's terrible, Mother! One gets the impression of a self-sufficient power that listens to nothing, over which one has no control, which scoffs at everything, which is only oriented towards destructiveness—because it is really a power of destruction—and it scoffs at everything: nothing matters. It's something in the depths of the being that is ready to do anything—to kill, to... anything.
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And it is a self-sufficient power: you can talk to it, you can threaten it, you can warn it: "If you do that, this will happen to you"—it absolutely doesn't care.
One gets the impression of being in front of something.... One doesn't know what to do, one doesn't know what can cure it, or tear it out.
Oh, it can't go out of the world. You see, that's it: it has to be in the place where it will INEVITABLY, necessarily be transformed.
Yes, but where... where is that place?
Ah, that's it.... We don't know. If we could become transparent instruments—we have so many dark spots! That's what's terrible, those dark spots. If we could be like a... something like a searchlight of the Divine shining constantly, which nothing could dim—that's the only way. To be like a searchlight casting the Divine onto the world. He is there, but the world... as you say, doesn't see Him, doesn't care about Him. Such a blinding searchlight should be made of Him that one is forced, compelled to acknowledge Him.
But is there a point THERE that can understand reason?
Oh, yes—everything is divine. There is ONLY the Divine. But He is broken up into opposites. And the extreme opposite can be touched, overcome, if you will, transformed by the divine extreme—halfway measures won't work. It is the divine extreme that will be able to transform the dark extreme: by absorbing (gesture of taking into herself), absorbing and blotting out the darkness. By absorbing it, it can blot out its action.
But a tremendous power is needed.
Yes.
Especially a power of endurance. What is most important is a power of endurance that absolutely nothing can shake.
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When you look at it close up, it's really a force of destruction, because if you say to that point, "But look, if you go in that direction, you're going to die, it's your ruin"—it absolutely doesn't care.
Absolutely.
If you say to it, "You're going to get cancer, you're going...."
It doesn't care, nothing matters—nothing.
It's really something which wants your ruin—which wants RUIN.
Yes, but in itself it is the worst falsehood, because it's impossible—it's impossible: the world cannot disappear, you see. Thus, in itself it is Falsehood incarnate.
(very long silence Mother sits looking)
It comes like this (gesture of hammering): the only solution is the ONE—there is a Oneness. The only solution is always Oneness. There's a kind of incapacity to see that everything we call "falsehood" is the ONE AND THE SAME Thing, it's we who see it incorrectly. And naturally it seems quite stupid, and yet that's it: ONE—ONE, ONE, ONE... (same gesture of hammering).
(silence)
The solution is in the capacity for oneness. But how?... (Mother shakes her head)
You know, the creation is the result of division; but that creation has to become Unity in order to become divine again. At present, it seems like absolute nonsense, and yet that's it.... The creation
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is the result of division (or at least, rather, to be more exact, division has become the result of the creation), and so it has to be.... Only Unity can restore—restore how? I don't know.
Indeed one can easily understand, in flashes, when one is faced with that... that Blackness, that darkness and falsehood, that it is not ultimately here to ruin us, but to lead us towards something else.
Yes. Yes, exactly.
That, one understands in flashes. It's there to lead us to a stronger point of light.
But the transition isn't easy.
(Mother shakes her head)
(long concentration, Mother takes Satprem's hands)
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