Others too had to understand Her secret - her own disciples, Nations. Will she be heard? Will she be allowed to pursue her experience? '... The body knows that the work will go on and on and on...'
The last turning point of Mother's yoga, and she comes out of it with this cry: "I have walked a long, long time. There was nothing but a constant cry, as if everything were torn away from me. It was the whole problem of the world." And this Agenda is more and more strewn with heartrending little cries. It was not enough to have found the secret for herself, the others too had to understand, her own disciples, Nations locked in their egoistic power: "They have no faith! 'She is old, she is old', an atmosphere of resistance to the change; 'it is impossible, impossible' from all sides.... Not a single minute should be wasted - I am in a hurry.... The reign of the Divine must, oh, must come!.... If the entire Russian block were to turn to the right side, that would be an enormous support! The victory is certain, but I don't know which path will be followed to reach it.... We must cling, cling so tightly to Truth.... They don't listen to me any more." She is 93, groping her way into the unknown: "I see more clearly with eyes closed than with eyes open, and it is a physical vision, purely physical, but a kind of physical that seems more complete. The consciousness of the cells is what has to change, all the rest will follow naturally! I have the feeling I am on my way to discovering the illusion that must be destroyed so that physical life may go on uninterrupted - death is the result of a distortion of consciousness." Will she be heard? Will she be allowed to pursue her experience? "Only a violent death could halt the transformation; otherwise the body knows that the work will go on and on and on...." And this cry again: "There will be a miracle! But what, I don't know."
(Mother calls Satprem in an hour and a half late.)
It's an invasion! An invasion.... It's dreadful.... I don't know what to do.
And your news?
My news!... I don't know.
Has the book come out yet?
No. I hope towards the end of next week.
The end!... People really need it. I get ten-page letters telling me "spiritual experiences"—which are completely in the vital. They don't understand a thing. Even in Auroville they're like that, they don't understand.
So I wrote... (Mother tries to recall) what did I write?... I don't remember. True spirituality... I know I put simplicity. "True spirituality" in big letters.
I should have put true spirituality is VERY simple! (Mother laughs) That's even better.
And then quarrels over nothing, people wanting more money—oh, a subhumanity! And they think they're.... You see, they are
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grossly ignorant; they come here without experience, without knowledge, without preparation, and they think they are going to realize the Supermind right away.... It's really pathetic.
Some things are... they display reactions and attitudes one would be ashamed of in ordinary life.
They need something to straighten them out.
Mother, maybe we could publish in the next "Bulletin" part of what you said the other day about your perception of people's inner condition and the frequent absence of flame.
They're going to despair.
Maybe it will be a "challenge"!
Can you read it to me?
(reading)
It's good, it's very good.
Yes, that's it, exactly it.
(long silence, Mother sits looking into the distance)
Obviously there is a great change in the nature, I can see it. When I look at my body live, it's as if I were seeing the body of someone completely new. Unfortunately it is... it lacks suppleness, I think.
There's this whole "formation" of age like this (gesture all around Mother), an almost subconscious idea that "she is old, she is old...." It creates an atmosphere of resistance to the change. It almost creates a conflict in the being. Outwardly, it's not so good. When I was sick, for example, I became increasingly bent over; now I would like to straighten up: the doctor says in a peremptory tone that if I tried to straighten up abruptly, I would break my back.... You see, things like that. "It's impossible, impossible, impossible," from every side.
Don't repeat that; I am telling you so that you keep it.
So there's only one solution for me.... Actually the only will that is all-powerful is the Divine Will—what He wants will be in spite of everything, or because of everything. That's all. It's not my concern. Only, it's not going as fast as it could if circumstances were different. But probably that's my own opinion. Probably it's as good as it can be.
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We'll see! (Mother laughs)
Oh, I am counting very, very, very much on your book.
(Mother takes Satprem's hands)
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