Others too had to understand Her secret - her own disciples, Nations. Will she be heard? Will she be allowed to pursue her experience? '... The body knows that the work will go on and on and on...'
The last turning point of Mother's yoga, and she comes out of it with this cry: "I have walked a long, long time. There was nothing but a constant cry, as if everything were torn away from me. It was the whole problem of the world." And this Agenda is more and more strewn with heartrending little cries. It was not enough to have found the secret for herself, the others too had to understand, her own disciples, Nations locked in their egoistic power: "They have no faith! 'She is old, she is old', an atmosphere of resistance to the change; 'it is impossible, impossible' from all sides.... Not a single minute should be wasted - I am in a hurry.... The reign of the Divine must, oh, must come!.... If the entire Russian block were to turn to the right side, that would be an enormous support! The victory is certain, but I don't know which path will be followed to reach it.... We must cling, cling so tightly to Truth.... They don't listen to me any more." She is 93, groping her way into the unknown: "I see more clearly with eyes closed than with eyes open, and it is a physical vision, purely physical, but a kind of physical that seems more complete. The consciousness of the cells is what has to change, all the rest will follow naturally! I have the feeling I am on my way to discovering the illusion that must be destroyed so that physical life may go on uninterrupted - death is the result of a distortion of consciousness." Will she be heard? Will she be allowed to pursue her experience? "Only a violent death could halt the transformation; otherwise the body knows that the work will go on and on and on...." And this cry again: "There will be a miracle! But what, I don't know."
Do you have something to say? You don't have anything?
No, Mother, nothing encouraging.
(Mother goes within for a half hour)
Strange, there's a child beside you. A child who must be between one and two years old—blond. And he is looking, he is putting his hand on your shoulder.... He's.... He seems very, very intelligent.
(Mother goes back within)
No questions?
Who is that child?
I don't know. I looked at him, he grew till he was about 10 years of age. And he stayed there. I saw him very young, two years old, then he grew, grew to about 10 years of age. He had his hand on your shoulder and was always looking at you like this (eyes wide open with a sort of devotion or adoration).
I don't know.
He was European—not Indian.
It's not my brother... who has left his body?
Ah, could be!
But is your brother blond?
Yes, when he was little, he was blond.
Oh, then it must be him.
But does that mean he has quit his body?
No.
Because he has taken a wrong course, you know—outwardly at least.
Page 241
(after a silence)
He was conscious. The child was conscious.... Perhaps it was his psychic being which has left?...1 A total trust, you know (same wide-eyed gesture), like that.
Oh, but it's peculiar, because he was blond when he was small [in Mother's vision], and when he got big, his hair turned darker—I noticed that. He was about... about ten, maybe.
You see, it was total trust. He was very quiet, looking at you and looking at you... with total trust.
But it wasn't the physical being.
Yes, I understand.
(silence)
It's night in France at this time?
Now it must be.... It's the early hours of the morning, it must be five or six o'clock in the morning.
Do you think he is sleeping at that hour?
Yes, certainly.
It means he would have a two-year old psychic being (you see, they don't have age per se, only in terms of development). And he grew up at your contact.2 It's interesting.
(long silence)
Is he younger than you?
Yes, physically I think he's five or six years younger than I.... But he has completely taken a wrong course.
Yes. Did his psychic being leave him?... Maybe.
It's quite possible.... I once saw him cut in half.
Page 242
Oh!
Only the lower part remained.
Then that must be it.
And the last time I saw him, he was upside down, his head down and his feet in the air.
Ohh!...
He [the psychic being] seemed to be completely independent. And when he came—I saw him come—he was there beside you, he put his hand—his little hand—on your shoulder, and he looked at you like this (same wide-eyed gesture), and then slowly he grew and grew to about eight or ten years of age and then stopped. It is not a fully formed psychic being.... Perhaps it has left him. Perhaps he left it.
Do you mean he has to go through another life to find his psychic being again?
Oh, certainly.
But once the psychic being has left someone, it doesn't come back anymore?
Oh, yes, it can come back, but there must be a conversion.
There must be a conversion.
That the psychic came to you is a very good sign—it's a very good sign, even for him. Because ordinarily, when the psychic being goes away like that, it goes back to the psychic world and rests until the next life. But he has remained conscious and came to you. That's exceptional.
We'll see what happens.... Perhaps he's sick? I don't know.
Or else it left because the vital being (vital and physical) violently pushed it away.
Page 243
Yes, it's more likely.... He's thrown himself into rather terrible things.
I don't see him anymore, but I have the feeling he is there, he's not leaving you.
But you can't say it's your "brother," because the psychic being has been formed in other lives—it had ENTERED your brother.
Yes, of course.
(Mother goes within)
We'll see.
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