Others too had to understand Her secret - her own disciples, Nations. Will she be heard? Will she be allowed to pursue her experience? '... The body knows that the work will go on and on and on...'
The last turning point of Mother's yoga, and she comes out of it with this cry: "I have walked a long, long time. There was nothing but a constant cry, as if everything were torn away from me. It was the whole problem of the world." And this Agenda is more and more strewn with heartrending little cries. It was not enough to have found the secret for herself, the others too had to understand, her own disciples, Nations locked in their egoistic power: "They have no faith! 'She is old, she is old', an atmosphere of resistance to the change; 'it is impossible, impossible' from all sides.... Not a single minute should be wasted - I am in a hurry.... The reign of the Divine must, oh, must come!.... If the entire Russian block were to turn to the right side, that would be an enormous support! The victory is certain, but I don't know which path will be followed to reach it.... We must cling, cling so tightly to Truth.... They don't listen to me any more." She is 93, groping her way into the unknown: "I see more clearly with eyes closed than with eyes open, and it is a physical vision, purely physical, but a kind of physical that seems more complete. The consciousness of the cells is what has to change, all the rest will follow naturally! I have the feeling I am on my way to discovering the illusion that must be destroyed so that physical life may go on uninterrupted - death is the result of a distortion of consciousness." Will she be heard? Will she be allowed to pursue her experience? "Only a violent death could halt the transformation; otherwise the body knows that the work will go on and on and on...." And this cry again: "There will be a miracle! But what, I don't know."
(Mother listens to the reading of various letters of Sri Aurobindo for the next Bulletin and selects this one:)
"What your vital being seems to have kept all along is the 'bargain' or the 'mess' attitude in these matters. One gives some kind of commodity which he calls devotion or surrender and in return the Mother is under obligation to supply satisfaction for all demands and desires spiritual, mental, vital and physical, and, if she falls short in her task, she has broken her contract. The Ashram is a sort of communal hotel or mess, the Mother is the hotel-keeper or mess-manager. One gives what one can or chooses to give, or it may be nothing at all except the aforesaid commodity; in return the palate, the stomach and all the physical demands have to be satisfied to the full; if not, one has every right to keep one's money and to abuse the defaulting hotel-keeper or mess-manager. This attitude has nothing whatever to do with Sadhana or Yoga and I absolutely repudiate the right of anyone to impose it as a basis for my work or for the life of the Ashram. Page 167 "There are only two possible foundations for the material life here. One is that one is a member of an Ashram founded on the principle of self-giving and surrender. One belongs to the Divine and all one has belongs to the Divine; in giving one gives not what is one's own but what already belongs to the Divine. There is no question of payment or return, no bargain, no room for demand and desire. The Mother is in sole charge and arranges things as best they can be arranged within the means at her disposal and the capacities of her instruments. She is under no obligation to act according to the mental standards or vital desires and claims of the Sadhaks; she is not obliged to use a democratic equality in her dealings with them. She is free to deal with each according to what she sees to be his true need or what is best for him in his spiritual progress. No one can be her judge or impose on her his own rule and standard; she alone can make rules, and she can depart from them too if she thinks fit, but no one can demand that she shall do so. Personal demands and desires cannot be imposed on her. If anyone has what he finds to be a real need or a suggestion to make which is within the province assigned to him, he can do so; but if she gives no sanction, he must remain satisfied and drop the matter. This is the spiritual discipline of which the one who represents or embodies the Divine Truth is the centre. Either she is that and all this is the plain common sense of the matter; or she is not and then no one need stay here. Each can go his own way and there is no Ashram and no Yoga." April 11, 1930 Sri Aurobindo The Mother, XXV.23
"What your vital being seems to have kept all along is the 'bargain' or the 'mess' attitude in these matters. One gives some kind of commodity which he calls devotion or surrender and in return the Mother is under obligation to supply satisfaction for all demands and desires spiritual, mental, vital and physical, and, if she falls short in her task, she has broken her contract. The Ashram is a sort of communal hotel or mess, the Mother is the hotel-keeper or mess-manager. One gives what one can or chooses to give, or it may be nothing at all except the aforesaid commodity; in return the palate, the stomach and all the physical demands have to be satisfied to the full; if not, one has every right to keep one's money and to abuse the defaulting hotel-keeper or mess-manager. This attitude has nothing whatever to do with Sadhana or Yoga and I absolutely repudiate the right of anyone to impose it as a basis for my work or for the life of the Ashram.
Page 167
"There are only two possible foundations for the material life here. One is that one is a member of an Ashram founded on the principle of self-giving and surrender. One belongs to the Divine and all one has belongs to the Divine; in giving one gives not what is one's own but what already belongs to the Divine. There is no question of payment or return, no bargain, no room for demand and desire. The Mother is in sole charge and arranges things as best they can be arranged within the means at her disposal and the capacities of her instruments. She is under no obligation to act according to the mental standards or vital desires and claims of the Sadhaks; she is not obliged to use a democratic equality in her dealings with them. She is free to deal with each according to what she sees to be his true need or what is best for him in his spiritual progress. No one can be her judge or impose on her his own rule and standard; she alone can make rules, and she can depart from them too if she thinks fit, but no one can demand that she shall do so. Personal demands and desires cannot be imposed on her. If anyone has what he finds to be a real need or a suggestion to make which is within the province assigned to him, he can do so; but if she gives no sanction, he must remain satisfied and drop the matter. This is the spiritual discipline of which the one who represents or embodies the Divine Truth is the centre. Either she is that and all this is the plain common sense of the matter; or she is not and then no one need stay here. Each can go his own way and there is no Ashram and no Yoga."
April 11, 1930 Sri Aurobindo The Mother, XXV.23
It's going to give a rather unflattering picture of the Ashram.... But it's true, terribly true. You could say it's just what is happening now! It could have been written now.
What do you think about it [for publication]?
I don't think anything.
What do you feel?... But you're going to tell me you don't feel anything!... Personally, if this (pointing to the body) weren't what people call "the Mother," if it weren't me, I would say yes. It's exactly what is needed.
Page 168
Then it should be published.
I don't want to look as if I were defending myself!
But you're not! And what does it matter anyway.
All right, I prefer it that way.
Let's just publish it. The other quotations1 give a slightly dark picture of the Ashram, especially when put together.
Yes, just one.
He left twenty years ago—he left in '50, twenty-two, twenty-three years ago.
Twenty-one years.
But it went on all the same.
(Mother goes within)
Your article [on Bangladesh] seems to have had a lot of effect—a lot.2 There's a complete reversal. They're now expecting war.
But do you know that the Americans are sending arms to Pakistan?
I've heard it. They say it is not the American government.
Yes, that's easy to say!
But the American manufacturers.
It's easy, they can say anything they like.
They're expecting war here in about a week.
But the Indians won't move unless they get hit on the head!
Page 169
But it's the Indian government that said it—they're getting ready for it. They weren't ready [in March].
How odd. They weren't ready a month ago, and now they're suddenly ready!
(Mother nods her head) I have received news from people who organized the troops, and they're ready to enter Pakistan tomorrow, if they're told to.
If they're told to.
Yes.
As a matter of fact a minister3 has gone to various countries to tell them they intended to make war.
!!!
And, I believe, he's coming back today or tomorrow with the reactions. And then we'll see. It's a matter of days. I have the latest news from the government—it's the government that sent me the news.4
I'm skeptical.
What they say is always worse—worse or better—than what actually is. That's the last I've heard.
In any case, they informed me officially.
We'll see.
(silence)
You see, there are also the refugees5—the refugees cost more than the war.
Page 170
But of course!
So they've woken up, they've finally understood.
They've finally understood! How dense!
And so they want to send all those people back home with troops to protect them.
You don't have anything?
I have some news from P.L. You know he had submitted the book "On the Way to Supermanhood" at the same time as "The Sannyasin" to Flammarion, a publisher in Paris. And they refused them.
Oh, they refused them!
Do you want me to read you what they said?
Paris, June 14, 1971 "Thank you for submitting the two manuscripts by Sri Satprem, 'By the Body of the Earth' [The Sannyasin] and 'On the Way to Supermanhood.' "Unfortunately, in both cases, our readers felt that Sri Satprem had not succeeded in laying the foundations of his beliefs, ultimately rather vague, or at any rate not easy to convey. As for the style, it only very rarely injects life into those inexpressible and often suspect things. It is principally the lacunae which persuaded us that we cannot consider publication." Signed: O.L.
Paris, June 14, 1971
"Thank you for submitting the two manuscripts by Sri Satprem, 'By the Body of the Earth' [The Sannyasin] and 'On the Way to Supermanhood.'
"Unfortunately, in both cases, our readers felt that Sri Satprem had not succeeded in laying the foundations of his beliefs, ultimately rather vague, or at any rate not easy to convey. As for the style, it only very rarely injects life into those inexpressible and often suspect things. It is principally the lacunae which persuaded us that we cannot consider publication."
Signed: O.L.
What do they mean?
Well, it means first that I didn't succeed in giving a solid basis for my beliefs, which are rather vague....
Page 171
Well, of course!
And as for the style, only very rarely does it bring to life those so-called inexpressible things, which are suspect. That's what it means.
What does it mean?
It means those so-called inexpressible things are suspect, they don't ring true—they sound like deceptions or distortions or imaginations or I don't know what..
And what about those 3,000 copies [of Supermanhood], what are we going to do with them?
I have no idea.
Are we going to ship them there anyway?
But ship them to whom, where?
To the distributor whom A. saw.
But he's taking only 200!
(Mother laughs)
He's taking 200 of them and it's going to take him two or three years to sell just those.
Bah!
If it's not handled by a publisher, there's no publicity, and if there's no publicity, there's no sale. It's that simple.
(Mother goes within for a long time)
There must be a man. I feel there is certainly a publisher who would be happy to take it. But I no longer know....
Isn't this a sign that my work is over?
Page 172
What are you talking about!
No, I see a great success for the book, I see it, it's concrete.... There is a publisher who will be happy to take it, but I don't know the names.
It's clear to me, only it's ahead, in the future.
Is there a way to get the names of all the publishers in France?
Yes, there's a way. Do you want me to make a list for you?
Yes, make me a list. I'll see if the Light shines on one of them.
I see.... I see.... They gave it to some old fellow to read, you see—I don't mean old in age, I mean old in intelligence.
But they're all like that!6
No, all are not like that. But some just don't care a hoot about it—he's one of them.
Perhaps someone who doesn't have a lot of money and would be only too happy to have our printed books—he would only have to put on his own jacket.
I feel very strongly, you know.
I'll bring you a list, then.
No, it's not at all blocked; on the contrary, it goes very far ahead—it's not blocked at all, it goes very far, a matter of about ten years. In ten years it will be strong. I see it.
Page 173
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