These conversations with the Mother, originally held in French, were noted down from memory by Mona Sarkar. They took place during the period 1959 - 1968.
The Mother : Contact
These conversations with the Mother, originally held in French, were noted down from memory by Mona Sarkar. They took place from 1959 to 1968, and covered such topics as the Mother's way of working with sadhaks, the different nature of the experience when people met her in her interview room, her work to reveal the divine harmony behind appearances, her relation with her own Mahasaraswati aspect, the power of Sri Aurobindo's presence one feels in his room, and the new consciousness that descended on earth in 1969. The last fourteen pages contain the Mother's written answers to questions Mona had submitted to her in his diary in 1951. The book contains many photographs of the Mother and facsimiles of her handwritten notes in the original French.
THEME/S
Significance given by the Mother
‘Divine Grace’[1]
“Thy goodness is infinite; we bow before Thee in gratitude!”
Bonjour!
Bonjour, Douce Мèrе.
What … you have brought ‘Divine Grace’ for me?[2] (In a teasing tone) But… why? You still have need of Grace? You do not have enough? But what is it that you want?… Is something not all right, not working?
Mother, is there any limit in asking for the Divine Grace? I do not think so.
Perhaps not, from a certain point of view. It depends….
But you are not aware of what surrounds you, of the Grace that is showered constantly on all of you. You are bathed, inundated, filled up till there (indicating the head) with the Divine Grace. You have no idea as to what it is, of the phenomenon, of the Grace that works around all of you, to protect you, to vivify you, to sustain you, with its wings spread out like a mantle of compassion to contain you guide you, and bless you constantly. It is astonishing!…
What a Grace surrounds you and is showered on all of you.
Be humble in order to become even more receptive and admit His Presence.
June 12, 1959
* * *
(Mother spoke about Grace on yet another occasion.)
Bonjour, Douce Mère.
(Mother distributes flowers to those who were waiting for Her. At the time of giving it to me, She stops) If you stand there sulking, I do not give you flowers. (I stretch my arms to take the flowers.)
What? You do not know how to smile? Smile.
(I thought then that one had to maintain a very serious attitude when receiving something from the Mother. So I said nothing)
If you do not smile, I do not give you flowers. What, you want some flowers?… Only if you smile, otherwise I do not give you flowers. Do you want them or not? Look at that…. No reaction at all…. He does not want to smile. What? I cannot stay here all day before you, like this, and you remain like a block of stone. Hurry up, I have work to do….
Do you want or do you not want a flower? If you want it, you must smile … at least a little, so that I may see your teeth…. Oh, he is obstinate. No way to convince him.
Smile! (Mother speaks a bit loudly). What forbids you? … Look!… That means you do not want the flower. But I stick to my word.
It is for the last time: (In a tone of exaggerated deference) I beseech you, Sir, to descend from your height and oblige us with a smile, (teasingly) to condescend to come down to our level; have the kindness, sir,… (gesture of the hands and the body, like the courtiers of the middle ages) to favour us with a big smile, — but let it be honest and surging from the heart….
Oh, nothing can move him. He is firm, decided…. What, why don’t you speak? What forbids you? (I stretch my hands for the flowers, without speaking) No, I do not give it to you, if you do not know how to smile. I give on condition that you smile…. No effect. What,… do you want it or not? Now, I am going, I have work to do. (Mother turns to go upstairs) That means, you do not need my flowers.
Well, Au revoir.
April 1950
(Mother walks towards the staircase, then turns back) What, have you changed your mind? Now, do you want it?… yes? come. (I advance towards the Mother) Again, the same expression, you cannot smile? Look! No…. But I am much more obstinate than you are. The ticket… smile and you have a flower. If not, I do not give it to you. It is as simple as that. Do you consent? No?… Then I am going away. (Mother goes towards the staircase to go up to the 2nd floor, and She turns back) It is clear that you do not want a flower, since you do not smile. Evidently, I do not give it to you. If…
Mother, You cannot refuse me the Divine Grace.
What? Say that once again that I may hear you properly.
Mother, You cannot refuse me the Grace.
(Mother hurries back towards me with a change in her mood.) What did you say, my child? Refuse the Grace? That I cannot…. How can I? Ah! If you knew what Grace is; what I have to endure to bring the Grace down to men and the worlds, in what circumstances and what resistances…. If you knew what I have to do, and in spite of…
Since I have a love and compassion which extends and pours itself towards the earth and its beings without their asking for it or deeming it necessary, since my Grace gives itself and never asks anything in return, since I have consented to come down into this ignorance, to take on myself the burden of misery, of suffering, of the resistance of the inconscience in order to heal and transform the fate of man and the destiny of the world, since my will is tied indissolubly with the beings and the world, — that is why my compassion flows without restraint. It is because I have such a relation with all of you that my Grace bathes you, without your wanting it or not…. It is like this perpetually.
You do not know who I am, who has descended amongst you all — it is the Supreme who has consented to lift you up out of the ignorance. (I bow down at the Mother’s Feet.) It is because my supreme Grace and my Compassion reach out towards all of you in an overwhelming way that you are so well protected. That is why, … how can one dream of a life without Grace? That I cannot, my child. I cannot deny Grace to anyone. You are all a portion of me, held by my consciousness and tied by my consciousness, one with me.
When you understand what it means, then you will have taken a big step forward, you will have solved many a mystery. Here, take the flower and with it, the Grace. Never doubt it… what will follow … it is unforeseen…. But it is worth something…. It is direct and more true and real.
You will see, my child, in what abundance the Grace is showered on all of you, … you do not know, you have no idea. Then how can you know who I am for the whole universe, the worlds and the beings: the Supreme Grace which extends over and penetrates all existence with its omniscience; and without this support, men and beings would not exist. So how can you be deprived of this marvellous blessings? That… I cannot, my child. I cannot. (I kneel before the Mother, She holds my face in both Her hands, looks into my eyes and concentrates….)
March 21, 1959
Is everything all right?
Yes, Mother. But how do You find me?
What I see, I know very well. I know what is happening within you, about which you know nothing. You do not know what is happening within you, but I know it very well. I am asking you how you are outwardly, your thought, your attitude, where you are in relation to your goal, and outwardly, how you are, your body, and so on. I am not asking you how you are inwardly. That, I see always.
That is why I am asking You, Mother, to know; if only You would tell me how I am inwardly.
But who has forbidden you to know it? Why don’t you make the effort to find out what is happening within you? Why was the consciousness given if you do not try to widen it and find out the secret so as to live and feel the great world of the Consciousness? We are here for that: the pursuit of the Consciousness, of the Vast, the Eternal, and a New Life, isn’t it? evidently, not to lead a monotonous life plunged in the inconscience.
But you must try and find the Consciousness in order to know what is happening within. It is for you to do it, so that you may know the true purpose of your life. This is the work to be done…. Why ask unnecessarily? Do your work sincerely. Make this effort so that you can find your soul….
(after a while)
Well, do you read sometimes?
Yes, Mother.
And what do you read?
Your books and Sri Aurobindo’s books.
Oh, and do you understand what you read?
A little better now, Mother.
Then you understand life.
No, Mother.
Well, what do you understand then?… Is it not life?
It is more than life.
Yes, yes, you are right, it is more than life, there is everything, it is the whole universe is described there.
The march of the whole universe is described so well, the meaning, the development and all that — till its apotheosis.
Mother, I wish that my aspiration reaches you.
My child, how do you know that your aspiration does not come to me? You believe that I am only up there? You think that I am sitting only here? No, my child, I am everywhere. I am here, there, up there, (gesture) below, and everywhere. I am everywhere at the same time. And this, the body, it is a tiny, very, very tiny part of me. This, (gesture) is an infinitely small part of me. So, do not think that it does not reach me. If your aspiration is towards me, then it will always come to me, not only here or up there, because I am everywhere….
(After speaking of some other things, the Mother continues)
… The most important thing is to prepare yourself inwardly, to feel my Presence everywhere. It should be like something that surrounds you constantly, which makes you conscious of a Presence, and you should not do anything outside this Presence. At each minute you ought to be enveloped by this atmosphere; do not do anything without feeling the Presence that guides you. Now you must aspire to feel my Presence concretely. Your aspiration must be so intense that the thing you aspire for — the Presence — should vibrate in front of you. When you close your eyes (Mother closes her eyes) and you call ‘Ma’, I must be physically in front of you. You must vibrate and radiate with my Presence. You will be able to feel my Presence, like this: the nose, the face. (Mother touches different parts of Her face) It should be so intense — the aspiration, wanting it to manifest — that the Presence becomes concrete…. (Mother opens her eyes)
You must feel my Presence concretely in front of you whenever you want it. You close your eyes and you aspire — and I am in front of you physically….
You have to develop, my child, you have to develop this consciousness so that you will be able to see me constantly. You should be surrounded by my consciousness….
You know, I am everywhere, everywhere: here, there, far, above, below, in you and even in the very depths of the inconscience. I am everywhere. When you call me sincerely, I appear before you. But you must develop this consciousness so that you are able to see me constantly, to feel my Presence because I am always with you. It should be like this: you call me and I am before you. You must aspire more intensely. Well…
I am not limited by this body. This body is a tiny part of what I am. It is an infinitely small part of my consciousness. This that you see, this body, is only a small part of my consciousness manifested to come in contact with people, the world … as I am here: to speak, to guide them, to show and to love, to tease them and sometimes to tap them on the head. (I bow down. Mother taps me on the head. We laugh.)
This body is nothing. It is only a small base. But me, I am infinitely vast. My consciousness is everywhere and in everything and wide as Infinity. This body is only a small portion, it is here in order to establish a physical contact, to give itself and to receive; it is not even a physical contact, but material, something material, you understand?
Au revoir….
Au revoir, Douce Mère.
April 10, 1966
(from the Mother’s written answer:)
… if I did not veil myself with a certain degree of obscurity, I could not come in contact with earth and men.
October 15, 1967
(In the course of a conversation Mother mentioned Her vital light)
But what does it mean, Mother, Your vital light?
My child, one who is enveloped in this light, has a special protection against everything. It is a special case for one who is enveloped by this light. It is the best protection that one can hope for. It is the vital protection which acts equally, everywhere. One cannot have a better protection. It is the ultimate protection. One who is protected by this light walks in the plenitude, in happiness; it is the Grace that takes care. It is an exceptional thing. He walks in liberty because nothing can touch him: the opposing forces which come to bar the way and the forces of ignorance cannot have any access to him, because he is completely enveloped by my light. He is shielded with a layer of light which nothing can penetrate. It is truly a complete protection.
Not many can keep it; very few, very, very few people have the capacity to retain this light. It is very difficult to keep this light constantly. If you have the power to keep it day and night, to be enveloped by this light, it would be something unique, for you would have the best protection in the world. There are very, very few people who can keep it. Because they start to wonder what it is, to turn it in their head, to think whether this is truly such a formidable power, or they begin to be agitated, to get excited, or in one way or another — they lose the contact with this light. This light can exist only in a perfect tranquility and in an immutable faith. Once we lean on the other side, it disappears. That is why, it is difficult. If you remain tranquil, there is no doubt that you will keep this with you. If one tries, one will succeed.
This is my vital light which will protect you against all the bad forces. When one perceives this light, one has the sensation that one is enclosed in a box of ice….
But a transparent ice …
It is luminous …
It is solid …
And it is immobile …
And one feels completely enclosed in this transparent box, it is like ice. This ice is soft and peaceful. One has a joyous sensation, as if one is enveloped by a light that protects us, that guides us and that increases our confidence. For truly, this protects against all attacks, whether it is vital or any other, if one remains enveloped by this light.
Like this, I have a range of lights which rise higher and higher, till the light becomes white. It is white like paper. (Mother indicates the paper on Her table) It is pure white. It seems solidly white and this light which is my own light, the white light, has an extraordinary power. This is very difficult to have, it is very far away, one has to surpass stages after stages in order to arrive there. This is the true light, and if one takes refuge in this light — my white light — then he has a protection or an incomparable help, he can conquer everything without letting anything touch him. Because, when one is in this light, the hostile forces, as soon as they come in contact, disappear immediately. Not a single contrary force can stay in this white light. Then one is in the Divine’s hand, enveloped by Him. It is the highest possible….
Like this, there are ranges of this transparent light, then more and more white, up to this perfect whiteness. It is this, my light. It is very, very high. It demands a lot of preparation to arrive there. My vital light is transparent, solid, luminous and immobile. For those who have this, they have a supreme protection. It helps one at each step of one’s life. It is very indispensable, it is the light that encircles and protects constantly. For those who have this light, it is a complete protection. Only it is a little difficult to remain immersed in this light, for as soon as one starts to think mentally (gesture) about its effects…. But if one is not agitated or else one does not do any stupid thing, then it remains. If you do stupid things, it will disappear immediately….
Only if one remains calm and tranquil, it remains and it protects — if one is calm and solidly established.
Have you been doing stupid things?
Mother, did someone tell you that?
No, I am not saying that you have done them…. Do you know what I mean by stupid things?
By stupid things I mean: when without even knowing it, one comes out of my protection. Say, now you are enveloped by my vital light, if you come out of this envelope, if you make a hole in this armour and through that the adverse forces can enter into you; if you do an act involuntarily, whatever it may be, you cross over its line of action, it is this, it is in this way that you make a hole without even knowing it. But if you have made a hole or else you invite the forces to penetrate, it is like this that you commit a stupid thing. This is what I call stupid things. When one deviates from the path, even a bit, one does stupid things, because one becomes vulnerable.
Suppose,… this is another case. At night, I protect everyone; I try my best to keep you all under my protection, so that you may not have bad dreams, so that you are protected against the hostile forces, so that you do not fall into an absolute inconscience. That is why, at night, I watch over you all constantly and this is the time when anything can happen, because you remain open to all sorts of attacks. And as you enter into a semi-consciousness or into an inconscience during your sleep, you do not perceive anything that happens at night. That is why, I envelop you all in my light, so that you may not have any bad dreams. Each one, I envelop you, like this, with rings of light, like a cocoon, before you go to sleep so that you can sleep tranquilly and remain under my protection so that nothing can disturb you. And this I try my best, to keep you under my influence. But, there are not many who can retain it. Either they remove it involuntarily, or else they do not prepare themselves, for instance, by taking my name before going to bed or at least try to open their consciousness to mine; anyhow, because they are not ready, that is why they lose the contact with me. They reject the light that protects them and thereby pass frightful nights. Instead, if they meditate a bit before going to sleep and make a small prayer, “I abandon myself completely to You”, then they remain under my protection during the night and nothing can happen to them. They sleep much better and wake up much more fresh and conscious. And one who moves out of my light, becomes the victim of innumerable attacks. It is this that I call doing stupid things. One who, even without knowing it, goes out of my protection commits a stupid thing. It is like this that one commits a lot of stupid things. You understand?
…There are not many who can keep it constantly. It is very difficult. It is an exceptional Grace to be enveloped by my light. Nothing wrong can happen when this light is there, even the illnesses and all that can never touch you. One is completely under me, under my influence. It is I who guide. And if one does not go out voluntarily, this never abandons you.
If one has a faith, a faith that comes from there (the heart) a true faith, then the light cannot disappear, it remains. If one is tranquil and armed with this faith, faith like an intangible sword (Mother shows this with the hand) which does not move, which rises straight up without wavering, well, with this, one is enveloped always by my light. It never abandons one because it finds a suitable ambiance and as it should be.
My child, you should develop this, this faith, then all will go well.
It is a marvellous thing, to be under my supreme protection.
July 2, 1967
Everyday, it is like this. It is almost 4 o’clock, and so late….
Mother, you say that every day it is like this, that You are late,… but, Mother, for you, what is time? You are above time and space.
Yes, my child, all this does not touch me. I am beyond time and space. Time, as men understand it, does not have any effect on me. It does not bind me. And I am not tied down by the ways of time or space. But the people who work with me, they are all tied down by time, hours and all that and they cannot grasp or follow what I do, or understand what is my domain. And it is absolutely evident, because for them, the sun, day and night and everything follows a regular and successive progression: this now, then that, then the other; at this hour I sleep, at this hour I eat, I go to school — and one follows the other. And men can think only of this sequence of time and this activity fixed for this particular hour. Ordinarily, man cannot go beyond this. He is upset if something does not correspond to the fixed hour. That is why I come down in this plane to work with them. If I remain in that plane of consciousness which is absolutely natural for me, that is to say, above time or its human classification, then no one could have access to me as I would always be inaccessible and incomprehensible. That is why I follow a linear progression, to be understood and to work with them. And work I must. Even when I work, time is only an indication. I am never a slave of time. For me, what I do is always guided from within where time is nothing but a zero. But for man, it is time, the external circumstances which guide him. And it is very difficult for him to think outside time.
And the sadhus and the yogis of ancient times, they used to enter the dark caves to rid themselves, or escape the influence of time, for they could not perceive either day or night as it was dark inside the cave. And they lived in the caves all their life in order to escape from the world which for them was a ‘maya’. But for us, the world is the field of action and it is worth something to transform it. And me, I do not advise this method of escape because as soon as they come out of their caves, they become victims of time and become what they were before, and what I they were afraid of becoming. This is of no value to us.
But for us, where the world is the field of action, one must widen the consciousness and be in touch with the universal consciousness and I abandon oneself completely to the Divine — the action, the work and everything. Then alone can one perceive gradually the action of the Eternal and the Infinite.
But now, to carry out the work harmoniously in the present condition with the people and the time available, one cannot do better otherwise, even though time is only an indication for me. For me, it changes nothing. But if one could stretch time, that is to say, instead of 24 hours in a day, if it were more, even then it would not change much, it would be better than now, but it would not make much of a difference, because we would still be limited by time, the rising of the sun, night and all the habits formed by the surroundings and through time. This is to try to do much, like those who want to stretch time mentally. This is impossible, for it is not so actually. It is as if one wanted to put everything into a small box which can barely contain much. One presses and presses but one does not manage to do it. It is not possible to put everything into a small box. It is not possible. In the same way, one cannot do everything in a single day basing ourselves on the mind. But for me, it is not like this. All this does not touch me. I remain above time or its influences. Time does not have any effect on me, it changes nothing in my work. And with all these differences, I do not complain. I am absolutely calm and I observe.
No, Mother, I do not say that You are complaining. It was just to know that I asked you.
It is all right….
But, Mother, You should not miss your meal. (Sometimes Mother would miss Her meals as it would be so late)
…. In fact, food has no effect on me. I can remain for a long time without food. It is almost not necessary for this body.
January 30, 1966
What have you brought? Show me. You have brought your note-book?
Yes, Mother, but first, this. (Every month I used to take to the Mother a calendar with a painting, and She would write a prayer for the month.)
Oh, the prayer for this month?
(Mother reads the previous prayers and looks at the new painting)
What is this? Is this ‘Divinité’?[3]
Yes, ‘Divinité’, Mother.
Yes, ‘Godhead’. It is good, all right. (Mother concentrates, then writes the prayer for the month of August:)
“Seigneur Suprême, Nous T’implorons: Manifeste-Toi!”
[“Supreme Lord, We implore Thee: Manifest Thyself!”]
Yes, that’s it, it is good.
Mother, “Manifest Thyself”, — what is meant by “Manifest Thyself”, like…?
It means, “Manifest Thyself as it should be. Manifest Thyself amongst us”. You do not know what it means, ‘Manifest Thyself’? (in a teasing tone) You know the verb: to manifest? — how does one conjugate it? (in French) “Je me manifeste, tu te manifestes, il se manifeste …” Don’t you know this?
Yes, Mother. But I wanted to know. “Manifest Thyself” — where and when?
Manifest amongst us. But when, I do not know. I am not concerned with it.
But as You have written the prayer for this month, therefore He will manifest in this month, or else You would not have written it for this month. There must be a link somewhere, Mother.
I do not know, my child, I do not know all this. I do not know when He will manifest, how He will manifest and where He will manifest. I implore silently so that He manifests Himself. I do not know all that you are asking me. Because five minutes back I did not know that I was going to write this. I know it only now after having written the prayer. That is all. I do not know and I do not take the trouble to find out all this. I cannot reply. I do not know, my child. Let us just pray.
August 6, 1967
(When I went to the Mother the next week, I asked Her about the prayer She had written)
Mother, I wanted to ask You about the prayer You gave me last time:
But Mother, You have already manifested, then what does “Manifest Thyself” mean?
Seen from a certain point of view it is true. But this is not the complete manifestation.
What does it mean? But You are the Supreme. Then what difference is there still? And You are here, You have already manifested. Who else should manifest again?
It is not here as yet (indicating Her body), His complete manifestation. It is not this that He wants. It is not yet fashioned in His mould. It is partially done and it continues, but it is not over. It is not yet luminous, plastic, malleable. It is not that radiant body that shines and emits the light. It is not transparent and luminous like the Lord’s — that body, vibrant and joyous, that does not take any form. That is not yet visible everywhere and for every one. This (indicating Her body) is not that yet. The Lord must manifest Himself here, I am preparing for the day when He will be able to manifest Himself. It progresses, it continues. Only the Lord knows when He will manifest. I know nothing, I do my work without getting impatient and without caring for the result. What He has assigned me to do, I do, — that’s all.
But, Mother, You are the Supreme Lord, then You know all this.
Me, I am the Manifestation, the World, the Universe, the Lord, All — it is the same thing. There is no difference. These are only different forms. In fact, it is the Lord Himself… (indicating Herself). But He has not yet manifested here (indicating the body); the Supreme must manifest Himself here in His totality, in His magnificence. It is this that I await. To make myself visible to all.
You know, perhaps I am asking a bit too much from the Lord. And because He sees it is too much for man to digest, that is why He is taking time. It should be realised now but He knows better. That is why,… or else my demand from Him is much too great for the world. It is not yet ready for that. I asked the Lord to make me visible even to the unbelievers and the most ignorant so that everyone may see me as in that illumined body, that I may be visible to everyone without exception, like a Descent, like the one for whom man has waited — a Benefactor — to assuage him from all his miseries and all his necessities — the Descent of the Truth upon earth. It is this that I ask for. Perhaps it is a bit too much. Anyhow, I wait without haste for that day. I asked what I had to ask of the Lord and it is for Him to ordain. I wait,… I wait….
Who knows, perhaps people do not want this as yet. It will turn the whole world upside down; they are afraid of what they will lose — all their so-called happiness, riches, their way of living, their pleasures, the pettinesses and the ignorance they still cling to and which have become so familiar that they are afraid to lose all this. That is why they do not want this stranger of a Truth to organise all their lives. Truly, they do not want it; they love what they are, they love their ignorance. This is all for them. They do not want me yet, that is why I cannot manifest.
But Mother, we want it, we want to see this radiant and illumined body, this transformed body.
There must be a milieu. There must be some persons who aspire for the manifestation. There must be persons of good will, an environment where men grow, men who aspire for the transformation, for the spontaneous collaboration and for harmony and peace and all that. There must be a suitable milieu so that I can descend. It is this that is still lacking. Is there one person who can say that he has no ego, that he is entirely for the Divine? Completely surrendered and without reserve? Is there one? …Not yet. I wait.
We will see when it shall be done. Let us wait. We will see, we will see the day when the Supreme Lord will manifest Himself here below (indicating Herself).
Mother, You have that patience; but we would like that it is done quickly.
All depends on the Lord, it is He who has patience. I do only what He tells me to do. It is His work and He takes care of everything. If He wants that it should be done now, the Supreme will manifest Himself here immediately. That is all. It is all His power. If He does not want it now, it will not be done. That is all. It is the Lord who directs everything. I say nothing.
Mother, again You are saying the same thing, although You have all the powers and You can do anything. If You want, You can do it right now.
No, my child, I am no one, I do nothing. I do nothing but what He dictates me to do. Perhaps He does not do it now, this miracle, because He knows better, because the world will burst into pieces if the Lord descended with His omnipotence. The world is not yet ready. That is why He waits. Perhaps He is experimenting and has found that the world cannot bear this grandeur of a miracle, even for a moment….
You know, that is why when there was a miracle, it never lasted for a long time. It was just for a moment. People would see, absolutely wonder-struck, this strange phenomenon; even for that moment people could not bear it. It became too much. That is why the miracles never lasted for a long time, because people are not ready for this sudden change.
Who knows, perhaps the Lord had descended here for a moment and had found that people could not bear it, or else the environment was not ready. It is for this that He waits. Maybe, He had manifested for a moment, and no one knew anything. It could also be this: He had manifested here for a moment. He alone knows…. But we shall see what He wants. We must be patient. I wait and I wait without paying any attention to all this. Because what is best, He will do. That is why I am not anxious to know when, how, and where He is going to manifest. Quietly I wait, knowing that one day He will manifest here (indicating Her body). The other things, — it is His affair, it is He who takes care of them. I know nothing.
And yet, You and the Supreme are the same, and You have descended here to accomplish this manifestation.
Yes, it is true. In spirit He has already manifested here, but not yet in His totality in this body. He has not yet manifested here. If He had, it would be completely different. This (the body) is nothing at present, it is but an illusion that you see. It does not have any existence. It is nothing at all. It is… ‘Phou!’ Like this…
Anyway, now I do not speak any more. It is over.
Why, Mother?
Because I do not want to mention it anymore. I should not speak of all this. It is finished. I remain absolutely silent….
It is already late.
August 13, 1967
(Mother holds my hands and concentrates for a while)
Something to say?
It has stopped, Mother.
What has stopped?
The sensations and the vibrations.
Oh!
Mother, when You do not touch me, it stops. I do not feel the vibrations.
All right, all right, now I understand.
As soon as I let go of Your hand, it stops.
And what do you feel?
I feel the vibrations…. (Mother holds my hands and concentrates for some time.) But Mother, why do I feel the things through sensations and vibrations and not through visions and experiences and all that?
But it is all right. What, you like visions?
But Mother, I do not see them.
You want to see visions…? What?
Mother I have read that if one has such experiences, one sees visions and there are others which follow.
And where did you read it?
Perhaps, in On Yoga, I think, Mother.
Oh, On Yoga, and you want to compare them? … You know it is not an individual’s experience that He [Sri Aurobindo] has dealt with. You see this, therefore it is that which must follow. No, no, it is far from that. He has dealt with the experiences of hundreds and thousands of people, only it is a conglomeration of thousands of experiences so it is vast and complete. It is difficult. It does not deal specifically with each individual.
You know, I work in matter, the material body, my work is directly in the material body and there one receives only the vibrations and the sensations and not the visions and experiences, etc. Because I work in the material and physical world, I can communicate directly through the vibrations and it is this that has the best effect on the physical body. It is, moreover, the most direct contact with the Supreme truth. It is only by the vibrations that I work with the individual in the physical plane because this is the most true and pure means which comes directly from the Supreme.
It is this that can radically change the consciousness, and because it is on the most material physical plane, therefore it has a greater influence on the other parts of the body, and it is this which is the basis of the transformation of the physical body. It is vibration alone which has a direct effect on the physical body, not visions and experiences, etc., — all that belongs to the mental or rather to the vital, you understand?
The visions, etc. belong to the vital-physical or the mental-physical plane and have a somewhat subtle and vague effect and are not so direct. They come and pass and leave a small imprint and that’s all; whereas the vibrations work for concrete results and penetrate deep into the being. And if one can remain absolutely calm and open, then the vibrations can bring down the whole Truth.
You know, when I work and I send a force to someone, and if he receives it in the form of vibrations and not visions or experiences, then he receives it in as complete and pure a form as he is capable of. And it is more direct and much more effective. And it is also the same for the Supreme Truth. When It wants to bring down something on the earth, It sends a tiny vibration which is charged and which penetrates Matter and from there It vibrates and works silently for its realisation. And it is the surest way.
Matter is very close to the Supreme where vibrations are concerned, for it can receive the forces directly only through vibrations.
When the Supreme wants to carry out something, He sends a vibration that works effectively on the body without any intermediary, for it is like this that the body becomes conscious. But the visions and all that, they are transcriptions and have to pass through intermediaries and are not so effective; but the vibrations — it is the direct energy of the Supreme. It is this that comes directly from the Supreme. It possesses the same force when it enters into the individual and there is no loss in the process and one becomes conscious, the body retains that vibration. But the visions, etc. are the transcriptions of the Supreme force, they are clumsy and are not direct and do not have the efficacy, because they have to pass through an intermediary which is either the mind or the vital. And one cannot call the Supreme by the thought, one cannot think of the Supreme Truth with the mind. It is impossible. It is a phantasmagoria that one creates by the mind. To define the Supreme, — it is absurd! There is no truth in what one creates by the mind, absolutely no truth. One constructs something false to satisfy one’s ego.
I do not like visions and all that because they become something that one can boast about and show to the others: “Look what I have seen or heard!” Whereas the vibration acts quietly and effectuates the necessary changes much more effectively, because it is a state that is and does not show itself, but which has an extraordinary power. You know, to arrive at this state, to feel this vibration which comes from the Supreme, one must be absolutely tranquil… a tranquillity, a perfect tranquillity without any mental constructions, but an absolute tranquillity… and all of a sudden one perceives, not by the mind, but one feels a vibration, which is almost not a vibration but a tiny stirring — which is nearly imperceptible because it is a state that is. And it is only in a perfect tranquillity and transparency that one receives this indication. And it is this tiny vibration of the Supreme which is behind the whole creation. It is this that sustains the entire world. And one finds this only in a perfect tranquillity. And one should not mistake this tranquillity for…. It is not a tranquillity which tends towards tamas or inertia, but it is a tranquillity which is ever conscious, all-absorbing, and which is charged and which vibrates and which has a transforming intensity. It is this that I call tranquillity, it is something that works itself out. When one has attained this state which is tranquil and peaceful, only then does one come in contact with the vibration which is behind all manifestation and it is this which gives the necessary impetus to realise something. Besides, there is another state which comes later and which is higher than this, but that is for later on, and it is not necessary that one knows it now. It is another state.
It is only in tranquillity that one perceives this vibration which is nearly imperceptible, for it comes directly from the Supreme. And the Supreme acts in the calm and tranquillity…. You see then, it is the best means to receive when I send a force to do the necessary work. It is the vibration or rather the sensation of touch which receives this vibration that I send. It is through the touch and the taste that the vibration can be transmitted. The vision belongs to the mental region and it is somewhat bound by its own domain. And when one hears a beautiful music or one smells the sweet perfume of a beautiful rose, these things belong to the vital. When one smells something beautiful and hears something beautiful: a voice or something, — all these come from the vital world whereas the touch, is the best means of transmitting these vibrations.
You know, in fact, I also work with vibration. I receive the vibration of men, of things that happen, of events, of the whole universe — all through vibrations. In the same way I send my help and all that in the form of vibrations which act according to the individual. Sometimes they see my form, my light … it depends. But it is through vibrations that I work.
It is by the original vibration that the Supreme had created the world and the whole universe. It is this that has taken different forms. The vibration planted itself in matter and from there, like a wave of vibration which passes, it shook the base to arrive at this result. This is the creative force behind the whole universe. At first, there was a vibration. The Supreme sent forth a vibration which by variations took the forms to create this universe. He has charged matter with this vibration. All is nothing but the effect of vibration. It is His Presence. He has awakened the inconscience by projecting this vibration which is at the base of everything. All the movements which we perceive are due to the Original Vibration.
That is why, I tell you that to feel this vibration is the most direct contact with the Divine. And it is by far the best, for there are no detours or transcriptions, it is absolutely direct and goes back to the origin.
Au revoir.
I will see you next Sunday.
June 26, 1966
Bonne Fête!
This is beautiful. (Mother picks up the flower ‘Attachment for the Divine’[4] ) It is pretty. Well, this is for putting in there, ‘Unselfishness’[5]. Yes, I have all that is required to complete the bouquet. Now all this is complete. And I will now explain to you. Do you know what these four flowers signify?
This is what I have prepared as the answer to what you had sent to me this morning. This is the base for everything — Unselfishness — the base for the ordinary life, for the life of yoga or for the spiritual life. Without this one can do nothing. It is the base — not to do things for one’s pleasure, to satisfy the little ego, but to learn to widen oneself, to open, to give oneself, not for the separate ego but for the others — an act of offering to the One who guides us. Unselfishness, that is the base, to do the best one can do and with the only aim of giving oneself entirely. And then, ‘Faith’[6] in the all-puissance, that is the ‘Divine Love’[7]; faith only in what the Divine Love is. And this is what effectuates the total ‘Transformation’[8]. These are the indispensable qualities at the base of all transformation. Develop in you this (Unselfishness), this (Faith) and this (Divine Love) then the fourth one (Transformation) will be within your reach. (Gesture) You see, now it is complete and also my answer.
The Mother’s Room
The Mother in Her Room
You know, what I see there, in my room, and what I see here[9], there is a lot of difference. There, when I see people, it is a physical contact with me. I see them and there is an exchange, but it is a physical contact. Physically, I meet them. Naturally I see the possibilities and all that they are capable of, their state of consciousness and their aspirations. I see their soul and with that the possibilities of their aspiration. It is, moreover, a direct contact with the subtle physical and all that is around them. It is this that I usually see, I do not see his appearance or how he is dressed. I see what he embodies, his soul and the progress he is capable of. In one glance I know what he can do. I do not need to examine him. For me, when I see someone it is this which emerges from him, his state of consciousness, his soul; and not the appearance — all that I do not see, for I am not interested in all that — not what he has as material possession or if he is rich or not. All this does not interest me.
When I see someone, I see his true being and it is that which tells me all that this person is. For some, it is a bit hazy and for others, a bit more dear. By seeing that, I know if he has possibilities for a spiritual life or not and I do not take time, just like that, in a single glance I know. And I give him what is necessary for him.
Whereas, when I see someone here, it is absolutely different, because it is not I who see here but the Lord. You know, it is here that I usually see people, that is why it is called the ‘Interview Room’. And when I see, them here it is not I who am presiding but the Lord.
The ‘Interview Room’
The Mother in the ‘Interview Room’
Before calling in the people, I concentrate on the Lord. And when He appears, I go behind Him, as behind a veil, and I give Him the whole charge of the morning for meeting people. Only I tell myself: Let the best happen to those who come to see me now, let them live in the Peace and the Light of the Lord. And saying this, I offer everything to Him and I go behind Him like someone who witnesses. And from that moment, it is He who presides, not me. It is a complete surrender to Him. Only I watch from behind all that goes on: how He envelops all with His Love and His Compassion. ‘Let the best happen to those who are touched by the Lord’. He bathes them in His atmosphere so that the people can live in the Peace and the Light. And this is the chance of their life, for it is the Lord who acts, and me, I am completely identified with Him. It is He who presides. It is so beautiful. You know, I remain detached like this (gesture) and I see the events pass and it is an altogether different contact. It is not that He does not come in contact with the soul of the persons who come to visit me, but He invites them to live this life. He shows them what is this love which purifies all, the Divine compassion and protection, He bathes you in this atmosphere. He leads you like this by the hand and shows you the divine joy. It is an absolutely different experience. It lifts you up completely towards the heights which one cannot imagine. Here, it is an experience of another kind. I usually see you there (in the Mother’s room), and today I see you here in another way.
Here, it is my aspect of Love and Compassion which predominates. It is He who pours His Love here. And there, you know it well, you come to visit me every Sunday, and it is a direct contact with the soul.
January 19, 1967
… Well, it is what I see when I see people. I see all in the subtle physical … sometimes it is in perpetual movement, that is the truth that nothing is inert or fixed or stable. It is always in continuous movement. Each thing, even the stone, is in reality in perpetual movement.
The truth is that nothing is fixed, everything changes. Outwardly, one sees nothing. Ordinarily one sees an object and there is no mutation, no change; it is fixed in one place and remains as it is but when we have this perception of the subtle world we see at each instant that it is a thing which is transforming itself, which is a movement; and in reality it is that.
Behind all this appearance there is a force which acts, the Force of the Supreme because of which each thing changes. It is the law of creation and it is His force which acts even through a stone. When one has this vision, one sees that everything is in movement. It changes, it changes … it changes; there is nothing that is fixed in this universe.
It is but now that science has found that everything is in movement, even the inert objects, all that exists is a huge game of forces.
Yes, Mother, the atoms and the molecules are always in movement.
There is nothing that is permanent or fixed, it is only the play of various forces; the atoms are in movement and it is this which constitutes the objects, therefore it is always in movement. It is not an immobile or inert thing. Apparently it is inert, but in fact the atoms are always in movement. This is only the first step on the path which the scientists have discovered. It is just a step; then there are lots of things to discover, that even what one sees as immobile objects … in reality nothing is immobile or fixed. It is always in mutation and movement. Science has discovered that outwardly it is fixed but in essence the atoms which constitute things are in movement. It is advancing bit by bit. Then they will see that even what one sees as fixed is not so in reality … this is the essence. This is the truth behind things. It is in the subtle world that the truth of things is found. Everything … everything, everything is in movement. Everything advances towards this, imperceptibly, towards the goal — that is why it is in movement….
When one concentrates, one enters into the subtle world and then there is also a moment when nothing exists anymore….
Yes, it is with open eyes, not with closed eyes, that one sees. With closed eyes one sees many things. One enters the vital or the mental world and one has very varied experiences. I am not talking about that: but when with open eyes one enters into the subtle physical one passes in front of the screen and nothing exists any longer. I am talking about that….
You know, when I see people, this is exactly what happens. I do not see them as they are in the subtle physical with their faults and their good qualities. No one can hide anything in front of me. I see what a person is in reality. I see his personality, I see his form, only a vague form, but I see all that he is, and it is this that interests me and which has a value for me. I see the man as he is. Sometimes I see only the subtle physical, sometimes I see it a bit mixed. Sometimes I see it transparent, then it is as clear as daylight. The person appears transparent before me, I see his soul, I see behind him all his possibilities, I see in this manner what he has, what he possesses, what he will become. I can work, and I can work very easily upon him. This is the best that can be — transparent and open. In this manner I see in his subtle physical what he truly is and in one look I see everything. And all this is always in movement. It is not something fixed and immobile. No, it varies, it changes constantly; sometimes what I see is moving farther and farther away, then it is just under my nose, very near. It is like that….
I am seeing, I am seeing and puff! It has disappeared. There is nothing. No one is in front — only a void. Then suddenly, it grows large, then it becomes small, it is a perpetual game which changes, it is always in movement. How interesting it is to see all this!
It is exact the vision of the subtle physical.
(One day, while talking about Savitri, the Mother said:)
… Like Savitri, the Prayers and Meditations has the same intensity of vibration and rhythm, the same origin, the same intuition, in fact, the same revelation with the power to transform. All that I have spoken about Savitri applies also for Prayers and Meditations; only His [Sri Aurobindo’s] is in English, in beautiful poetry, whereas mine is in French, and in prose. They are my experiences, descriptions of my experiences, of my sadhana….
… Not only the body, but even the substance is the same. It is the same consciousness with the same power of manifestation — descriptions of the journey of the soul to the Supreme. The same substance in two identical approaches, in two different forms. In fact, the same vision — the Truth to be realised….
Mother,
You have written in Prayers and Meditations:
“This book comprises extracts from a diary written during years of intensive yogic discipline. It may serve as a spiritual guide to three principal categories of seekers: those who have undertaken self-mastery, those who want to find the road leading to the Divine, those who aspire to consecrate themselves more and more to the Divine Work.”
Among these three, which path should one choose and practise?
It is not a choice, it is a progression. One begins with the first one, then one passes on to the second, all the while retaining the first. And he who wants to follow the third should have, at the same time, the first and the second — for the third is impossible without the first two.
May 20, 1951
It is You who give me my prayer, it is You who pray for me, it is You who grant me this marvellous Grace; as it is You who have wished, therefore it is already realised. Then, what is this game, Mother?[10]
This is the universal game and it will be perfectly harmonious when men will have understood it!
September 10, 1967
… You see, the Supramental has begun its work … it is evident…. For it to work, one must be pure, without stain or desires, nor cast a shadow in the purifying light. These are the conditions. It is difficult, but one has to prepare oneself…. And you will see how the very aspect of life changes, the very perspective, the attitude, all, everything takes a new form. And the immeasurable effect of the peace and the ecstasy seizes you. It cannot be compared to anything that one has felt before. Unbelievable! You will see, wait with patience….
But do you read the Bulletins sometimes? I give there my recent experiences, of what I am doing on my body, where the Supramental Force is working incessantly to transform it. These are moments lived, states of consciousness which unify my whole being, its movements, and its sensations in one single aspiration, infusing the Light, the Peace and the Ananda in a perpetual interchange. It is this, the effect of the transformation.
All this, I am giving a little of these experiences in the Bulletins under the title ‘Notes on the Way’ or ‘A Propos’. If you read it, it will give you a glimpse of what I have been able to establish in my body in a permanent way — the effect of the work of the Supramental transformation. This will guide you with assurance to advance on the way…. The infallible guide …
But… you understand, it is absolutely new, of an exceptional kind, which does not have a precedent, no one knows, no one has traversed this route, never has anyone had the experience of the Supramental world. It is for the first time that I have traced the route. Therefore, nowhere will you find the necessary help, the process to follow, how to overcome, how to face in order to surmount the difficulties, how one must stand in front of this dazzling light and the crushing force of the Supramental world, how one must be pure and without desires, in a transparent manner, to be able to open to this domain. For all these difficulties, I have given the key and the necessary directions to advance on this unknown path.
But one must be brave and intrepid, have an unvarying faith to walk on this path. Not to hesitate, not to be half here and half there that leads you nowhere. But to launch oneself with the convicted to conquer — whatever may happen. Then the recompense — it is the Supreme Beatitude. One thing I can assure you, that there is nothing equal to it, nothing more perfect, nothing more beautiful, more true and more vast. It is this … and it exists. And it is worth the trouble to lose all in order to gain all in Him.
It is sill that I am experiencing and feeling in such a real manner that my past conceptions, the ways of living, the attitude, the thoughts, all, all seem to vanish in irreality and that only the concrete experience of Matter is permanent….
It is this that I have given in the Bulletins — a little of my experiences, not entirely, but a bit, — like an indication of what I am doing, and all that I am experimenting and fee splendour that I did not know at all. Do you read them?
Yes, Mother, but it is very difficult to understand. (Mother smiles)
Yes, when you will have climbed to this stage you will understand better. And yet, all the directions are given, the steps and also the essence of what I am experiencing. But it is not put in the language that we speak or write. It is absolutely different and moulded in a sort of expression which suggests, rather than explains; and it is charged by a power which expresses and a light which illumines by itself without taking recourse to the words or their meaning. There are no sentences as we ordinarily have, with the verbs and the complement which accord with each other, with the turn of phrases and expressions similar to what we find in the books which give a precise meaning. But it is absolutely different here. It is the sound and the vibration which evoke a feeling, an emotion which give the indication of what we feel, but do not correspond to the ordinary sense — it is implied.
You see, I have stated these experiences which in fact cannot be formulated by the ordinary sentences and expressions, because it is so subtle, so sublime and suggests spiritual values which cannot be translated by these sentences and these expressions. The felicity, the joy, the aura and the spirit behind these expressions can be translated only by the projection of a state of consciousness in short sentences and appropriate expressions which are not found in our poor vocabulary. That is why for an intellectual or an erudite, this will be only a child’s babbling. They would understand nothing of what is written. The meaning is not exactly what the words stand for, that is the meaning and the explanation that the dictionaries give. But behind the words and the expressions or just beneath the lines are to be found a feeling, an effect of what I want to say but that is implied, which, in fact, projects the true meaning to the readers who are open and receptive.
You see, as in all that Sri Aurobindo has written, it is certainly not for the intellectuals to decipher, analyse and arrive at a conclusion by their logic. It surpasses all their comprehension. It is not by the intellect that one can understand Sri Aurobindo, or by the mind with its diverse faculties, — it is impossible. It is only with the help of the intuition and an inner illumination which opens the closed doors of the mind to what is above, which perceives and assimilates the true meaning,… it is in the flight of liberty, from the vastness of the regions beyond the imaginations where the Word is born that his pen describes and brings down the Supreme Knowledge. That is why each word, each sound, each expression, each vibration that they emit is charged with an ineffable force and an illumining light which can be expressed only by as many planes of consciousness that man has at his disposal. He who seeks the Truth of existence finds the highest he can reach in its true revelation. It is so, each word He has written is charged with a consciousness and an ineffable light which projects itself according to what is proper to the plane and to the level of the development of the consciousness of the reader. And at each level the meaning is different, and yet it is the same word which expresses a range of different significances. One must try to find the spirit behind the words whose value is expressed by the thousands of associations of beauty and of splendour. It is, above all, the rhythm, the cadence, the harmony, the colour, the beauty embellishing by the sound, the lucidity of expression, the subtlety of the thoughts and the spiritual ardour which He has so easily described in so simple and so profound a language, as if He has opened the celestial doors from where cascades the Divine Grace, the Grace which is accessible to all those who will take the pains to read his books.
And what I have done is to project the experiences which I have had, the words which I hear in the depths of my being, the soul-state that evokes the Inexpressible in visible forms, the perception of the Imperceptible, — not by the association of words or ideas, but by the vibration, — … a certain state produces a certain experience, a certain mode produces a certain perception. All this does not occur one after another, but it is simultaneous, synthetic and universally one, something which cannot be expressed. It is this … it acts … and it manifests. There is no mind, no formation, and it surpasses all the knowledge, conceived or expressed.
It is a new language or mode of expression where the words or the expressions express only the substance; but I was compelled to take recourse to words and sentences, just to seem to say what I wanted to express, just to guide, so that what is not written expresses itself from behind the words like an intuition. And when the expressions stop abruptly… with three points, what I want to say ought to reveal itself in what is not expressed by the words…. In the silence that follows is the great mystery to be found.
That is what you must find, — the state that the experience has revealed: not by following the meaning of the word, of the expression, not even by the impression, but a direct communication of this experience by a sort of revelation, of that which seems to be expressing itself, translating itself; it is not uttered, it suggests, and we understand without it being said or pronounced, something that beckons like a vibration murmuring in the soul, the revelation of this experience and of what follows, that which is not written. And consequently what ought to follow becomes more important and implies a whole series of revelations that develop more and more. It is as if one stands before the silence that is like a wall, and toc! one passes through and one finds oneself before the immensity from where the splendours of Knowledge flow towards you. It is like discovering the hidden treasure from where springs forth the joy of consciousness. In fact, what has not been said indicates that which has to be found. It is this….
It is this that you have to find in order to understand better what I have left unsaid. Look here…. The experience itself reveals its form and projects the all-powerful Truth that it contains without the intermediary of word or expression, Find what is behind and you have all that you want. Do not try to work things out with the mind. This surpasses everything.
Voilà! Au revoir.
…You know, when I was young, very small, about five or six years old, I was capable of guiding myself. I knew what was pleasing and good for me, and what was not.
When I was a child, I loved these fairy tales very much. I passed hours reading these tales, truly I enjoyed them; but only the fairy tales full of sweetness, of harmony, with pleasing and beautiful events, nice things, and which showed the good side of life; but never the tales which described the bad, the pain, the bad qualities or the characters that degenerate — all that I never read. I had a spontaneous horror for these tales. I did not like those bizarre and petty tales. But the beautiful stories, I had a great liking for them. And I remember that in my imagination, I would enter into the skies, the clouds, the heavens and all that was beautiful in the tales, the wonders, the palaces and the peaceful and joyous places. All that pleased me very much. And I entered these places in my imagination. I did all this by myself.
I knew how to choose the good from the bad.
March 20, 1967
… I remember an incident; it was a long time ago, but it is as clear as if it had happened some days back. I had a fever and I was feeling uneasy; so I went out of the house for a walk in the fields to breathe the fresh air. Suddenly, it started to rain, and I was in the middle of the meadows, alone, with the vast sky above me for shelter! and nothing all around. And it was pouring. And I was enjoying myself and frolicking like a little child free of worries. I was completely wet and water ran down my body. I remained like that so that the rain may wash me of all my defects and all my pains and charge me with the force and energy that it contains. I felt already a sort of peace and sweetness entering in me and the body was vibrating physically with an unknown joy. And my fever and all that, — gone, and I was feeling not only normal but also full of vigour. In half an hour I knew what the rain could do. For me, it was truly an experience….
If man could take advantage of all that Nature offers, without his mind intervening, he could have avoided much harm, much worry, in order to live a simple and healthy life. He is afraid of doing this and that, he is terrified of breaking his mental formations and he recoils before his habits and his past. If he were not afraid, if he did not have this fear — it is a fear which gnaws at his very existence — he could have lived a noble and a gracious life. But … it is better not to speak about this miserable condition and all that he lacks.
The rain — it is like a Grace that god sends to bless the earth and to purify it. It is this that gives life to Nature and the animals. It has an extraordinary power of purification. When it comes down, it vivifies Nature and fills it with a joy of life. It helps us in so many ways. As soon as the rain comes down, it purifies the atmosphere of all the negative formations that we throw in the air and the harmful forces that constantly try to destroy us. It makes the atmosphere clear and limpid and in a way cleanses the atmosphere of all these impurities. There are also the hostile forces who live in the atmosphere and they are afraid of water, and as soon as it rains they flee, and if they cannot, they are dissolved. That is why there is a sort of peace that is established in the atmosphere after the rain….
(On another occasion, the Mother spoke about the good effects of the rain.)
The rain is for one who wants to purify himself.
It washes you of all your defects, errors and your impurities. The rain has the power to purify the earth, the atmosphere and the people living in it. But one must keep oneself open, without the slightest fear — the fear of catching cold or falling sick. If we keep ourselves open to the vast above us and let the rain purify us, then there is a concrete result.
(Mother admires the leaves that somebody had given Her) It is beautiful, isn’t it? These leaves, we do not find them here. They are from the oak tree. You see the colours?
(Mother shows a card She has received)
And these are Narcissus flowers on the card. Someone has brought them now from Switzerland …
(Mother speaks about other things and then says:)
You know, one of the first times when I came out of my body, it was in a train. I think it was one of the first times, well, it was probably one of the first times. It happened like this: I was travelling in a fast train towards Marseille. It was a fast train which went directly from Paris to Marseille. Only it stopped briefly midway. I forget the name of the station…. Yes, yes, it was Lyon. This fast train started towards evening from Paris, stopped at Lyon for some minutes, and the next morning we alighted in Marseille. It was long, the distance, but as it was a fast train which stopped nowhere except in Lyon, and at the end of the night, we found ourselves in Marseille. And this train was fast. As I had the whole night to travel I looked for a place in the compartment to sleep or to stretch myself. Then, I lay down and I fell asleep.
Then, I came out of my body after some time, and I began to wander in the train, in the corridors, in the long compartment where I saw people who were sleeping, each one in his own way. They slept soundly and I saw these people. I passed from one compartment to the other and I was floating here and there. It was so amusing to see these people who were sleeping peacefully. I did not disturb them, but I saw them as clearly as one would see them with the physical eyes. I tell you, it was as concrete as seeing them physically.
Then I roamed a little more and when I returned, I saw that my body was rigid and immobile. The first impression I had was that the body I left behind had no life. It was as immobile as that. I looked at it from above as if it was a garment that I had discarded in order to take up another. Moreover, the experience was so concrete and living that there was no doubt that it was by far the best way to see things. Then when I re-entered into this rigid body, I remembered one after another, what had happened, and how I came out of this body and began to move from one compartment to another to see the spectacle which was unfolding in this fast train while they were sleeping at night. And early in the morning, when I woke up, I went round to see the compartments in order to verify whether my experience was real. And what did I see? It was the same scene that I had seen at night. I found each one in his place as I had seen them last night. They were nearly in the same position. I could recognise them very well, for it was still vivid in my memory. And it was exactly what I was witnessing now physically, as concrete as this. This experience reinforced my conviction that there was a truer way of seeing than with these physical eyes.
I had a similar experience in Paris, when I fainted on the road. It was during that period, I forget in which year it was, but it happened like this: I had had a heavy dinner in the evening and then I went to see a film. After the film, I came out with all that crowd which was still coming out and I found myself in the middle of all these people. Suddenly, I felt something strange. I felt giddy and I was feeling very uneasy, and I do not know how — plop! — I fainted, falling on the road. I do not remember any more what happened to me. Of course, there was someone with me who was trying to take care of me. A minute later, I saw that my body was lying on the road and there was a crowd looking at this body that had fainted. I asked myself: “What is this? What has happened to me? Why am I like this, lying on the road?” It was embarrassing, lying there on the road. So I hurried to enter in the body that had fainted. And as soon as I entered it, the body stood up with a start, as if nothing had happened. I think I had indigestion, because I had truly eaten a very rich meal. But the most important thing is that even when I did not have a consciousness in the physical body, still there was another consciousness which saw and directed me, otherwise it could not have lifted up a body that had fainted.
And I tell you, it is not only with this physical body that one sees, but there are other and better means to see and feel than with this physical body.
But, to learn all this, I did not practise yoga or do some special exercises. It came to me like this, like some events in life.
Naturally, Mother.
Why, ‘naturally’?
Because … from where are you coming…? … from high above — the Supreme. That is why, all this is natural for You, but for us, it is not like this. A lot of effort is needed. You forget that, Mother. (Mother laughs)
As I was telling you, in order to feel or see better, one does not need this body or these eyes. This body has no importance at all. It is like the clothes that one changes. As soon as one completes the experience with this body, one takes up another one to have other experiences. It is the same thing when one throws away one garment in order to take up another. When this is worn out you will throw away this shirt, won’t you? Likewise with the body, this (the body) serves nothing. It has no importance.
No, Mother, it is not true.
How is it not true?
It is evident, Mother, one cannot compare Your body with a piece of cloth. The body has a very great importance in life. And Your body is something else. It is completely different. It is a divinised body. One cannot compare it with ours.
How?
When I see You, I see You like this, in this body. At night, when I see You, You are exactly like this.
You see me like this at night? You do not see me in different forms? But it is strange; generally, when people see me, they see me altogether different, in different forms.
Yes, I see You in this body but sometimes, it is very…
Large?
Yes, Mother, large.
Yes, that is what I wanted to say… very large.
And sometimes, You seem to me very young.
No, not young but without age.
Eternal.
Yes.
So, You see, it is in this body that one sees you. Again, when I touch Your gown, I do not feel any vibration from it. On the contrary, when I touch Your body I perceive a vibration.
(Mother laughs) Yes, my child, there is a lot of difference, between this (the gown) and the body.
You cannot compare these two. And You told me that You were doing the yoga in the physical, in the body, for the transformation and that You were working on the cells…
Yes, my child, but it is very difficult and terribly slow, taking up cell after cell, it takes a lot of time. In such a long time, I have managed to do only half the work. No! not even half, one fourth of the work. It is very slow, and it takes an enormous amount of time.
Once, I went to Sri Aurobindo to know how long one has to wait and I asked: “How much time does it take to change this … into that?” and Sri Aurobindo replied to me: “It takes about 300 years for the physical transformation.” Three hundred years, it is long for a lifetime. However, I am not disheartened, one does what one can and as best as possible. That’s all.
Now, I am not allowed to come out of my body. And I take this time to do what is possible. I work, but this (the skin) to change into that, it is (pinching herself) difficult. The exterior does not change so fast but it makes no difference, because inside it is charged with consciousness. One cannot imagine, how much I am charged with consciousness and force. It vibrates with strength. And now, I am very sensitive, very, very conscious. This is what I have done. But, I tell you it is full, and I feel myself vibrating with consciousness.
I work and we shall do something.
Good.
Have you understood now?
September 25, 1966
(When I went to the Mother the next time, the topic of coming out of the body continued.)
What is it?
Mother, last time, You had told me that You are not allowed to come out of Your body. But why, Mother?…
I do not come out, because it is no longer necessary.
But, Mother, does it mean that You do not come out at night, to visit people, as You used to do before?
That, I was doing at least half a century ago. But now, I do not do it any longer. I have stopped it long back. That does not mean I do not see people. On the contrary, I do all that now and much better than before, remaining here. Do you think that I am limited only to this body? No, I am everywhere and at every moment, I know all that is happening in the world, because I am directing them myself. It is true that I do not come out of the body now, because it is no longer necessary. It was only a phase in sadhana, and I have left it behind. Now I am completely different. Even if I try to come out of the body now, I think I will not be able to because I have so many other things to do that it would be impossible for me to come out of the body. It is in fact a stage of experience that I have accomplished a long time back.
I think, it was in 1904 or … 5 till, … 1914… yes, before the War, and it was in France that I used to come out of the body. It came to me naturally, and I practised it, I think for these 10 years and I mastered it. I could come out of the body at any place and at any time.
I remember very well, in those days, when I fell sick and that I would rest on the bed or stretch myself comfortably on the divan and then I would come out of the body, I would float above the sick body and see it from above and drive away the sickness from this physical body. Because, being above the body, I could see where the pain was, then I would put the force there for curing it. And like that, I would be cured very fast. Usually, it is done like that. But now, I do it in a different way. And I do not need to go out of my body. You understand?
October 2, 1966
Bonjour, Douce Mère!
What? What happened? (pointing to my bandaged foot) You hurt yourself? How? While playing?
No, Mother, not while playing. We were working, and there was sand there, and the ladder slipped, and I fell down.
Is it serious? Anything broken? Any fracture or…?
No, Mother, nothing like that… it’s not so serious…
Really?
Truly, Mother.
So you had a narrow escape! (Mother laughs) Come, walk a little, let me see how serious it is. (I walk with a limp) Oh! Is it as bad as that? Your leg cannot support you … and you say it is not serious! My God, look, you have sprained your ankle.
No, Mother, it is not so serious. It will be all right in a couple of days.
Let us hope you will be all right soon. Take rest and do not try any tricks now. Avoid walking; walk as little as possible. A complete rest, that would be best. Unless you use crutches to go to the bathroom and for essential needs…. But do you know how to walk with crutches?
It is not difficult; yes, Mother, I can walk with crutches.
But be careful with these things, and especially do not fall down and come back to me with fractured bones. (In a teasing tone) It will look strange; with these crutches, you will look like a soldier wounded during the war. With these bandages and crutches, one could easily take you for a wounded soldier coming back from the war. And they seem to be proud of it. Anyway…. Be careful and do things slowly, slowly… do not try to walk before it is cured.
You know, I remember something that happened to me when I was quite young: I think I must have been … fifteen or sixteen at that time, and I was full of enthusiasm. Now and then, when the weather was fine, I used to go for excursions with some friends. We were six or seven girls; I do not remember all the details, but we used to go for long excursions. I was quite strong and well built, and we had a lot of fun crossing the meadows, going to the countryside near the hills, doing our little cooking, and all that. We spent some beautiful time under the blue sky, and we came back in the evening.
But one day, during one of these excursions, — we were on cycles — we decided to have a race, just like that. This was a mountainous region where the climbs were difficult and the descending slopes very, very steep. We were descending extremely fast, and suddenly, I don’t know, I had not noticed that there was on the road a big hole which was covered with grass and I could not see it, and I went right into it and with a rude shock I was violently thrown against the rocks by the side of the road. I almost fainted and the pain was so acute that I could not move at all. The acute pain immobilised me, I could hardly breathe: it was so painful, and the whole body was as if numb, paralysed. I did not know what to do. I was in a miserable state. And I said to myself: “But what has happened to me?” For about two minutes, I think, I was in shock. Then I pulled myself together a little, but the pain was unbearable. So I started concentrating to get rid of the pain which I could feel in my whole body. It was from the lumbar region (the lower part of the spine) that the pain began. I think it must have been a pinched nerve that had paralysed the body. But a few minutes later, I got things under control. I saw that my friends had come and were staring at me with utter consternation as I lay on the ground in this pitiful condition. They were scared seeing me in this state because they knew me a little and also knew that I never complained of anything. But I already had the situation under control, having detached myself from the pain. I had some knowledge of these things, and I asked them to lift me up. As soon as I got up I felt pain in the lumbar region — as if I had been stabbed. Worse than that. But I did not show anything in front of my friends. Without wincing, I endured silently.
Then they helped me back on my cycle, and pushed me with great difficulty because I could not use my legs. And I kept telling myself: “But what has happened to me, Lord? Why? And moreover, in such a desolate place? Help me.” I do not know how my friends brought me back home because I was praying and was in a state of trance.
But once I was home, I could work on myself. But immediately a doctor was called, a specialist, who examined me thoroughly. Of course, all the wonderful means we now have were not available at that time; still, this doctor was a very nice man and knew his job well. He tried some manipulation without making things worse, because it was extremely painful, then he stopped. He put a bandage and prescribed complete rest for three months…. I was to move as little as possible, because a vertebra had been dislocated and if I moved, it could happen again, which would be very dangerous, and even paralyse the legs or something worse. He was right, and before leaving, he told me I was a very brave girl, and again cautioned me: “You must be a good girl and obey me, otherwise you know what will be the consequence. Yes, of course you will be cured, if you obey me.” And he left.
It was very, very painful, and the least movement hurt. There was not a single comfortable position. Naturally, I was lying on my bed. So I concentrated very hard and I prayed to the Lord to take charge of me. And I tried as best as I could to detach myself from the pain. I remained there like a log, without moving at all so that peace was established, there. And the next morning, I was on my feet, and everybody was amazed to see me walking and doing all my work by myself, because the doctor had ordered complete rest for three months, otherwise something disastrous might happen. Everyone in the house was astonished and gave me so much good advice. But I was very obstinate and I followed the inner command.
Then the doctor came back after two days. And when he saw me walking, he too was stupefied. He didn’t know what to say. He was wondering how it had healed so quickly: two days ago she was dying with pain, and the slightest movement could have paralysed this poor girl. Now, look! Today she is walking about confidently. He could not understand. He was so annoyed that he became angry and scolded me because I had taken the decision without consulting him, and he said that what I had done was absolutely stupid and very dangerous. “She must not lift heavy things,” he announced. “And if she doesn’t obey me and something happens, if she becomes paralysed or if she gets rheumatism and all that — I am not responsible for it. I warn you: do not play with these things, especially when it comes to the spine…. So, I warn you: I am not responsible for it.”
And I told myself: “Nobody is responsible for me, but the Lord … and He knows what is good for me.” Anyway, the doctor seemed very displeased and he left a bit disappointed because he had not been able to assert his will.
I met this doctor many times afterwards and he asked me how I was feeling. So one day I explained to him in detail how I got cured the day after the accident, and who was the Person who cured me. He was even more astonished and he asked me how such a thing could happen. So I told him: “That is how I got cured”. When I explained it to him, he became very interested, and began to have respect for me. I have not been cured by medicines, which I very rarely took. Because there is a safer and quicker way, which helped me to be completely cured.
And I tell you, I have never felt any discomfort there…. I don’t know how many years since … naturally. Completely cured, and strong. It is like that.
I remember, once I broke my finger while playing tennis. I think it was the little finger, but I do not quite recollect… it was such a long time ago. But I am sure that I did not show it to anybody, not even to the doctor. When I fell down while playing, I felt an acute pain there, in the finger; to my great surprise, I saw it was twisted like a Z! I knew immediately that something was broken there. So I held the finger, manipulated it a little, all the while concentrating on the injured bone. I set it right and hurried home to put a bandage. And I concentrated intensely to get rid of the pain. And the next day it was much better.
When someone asked me what had happened to my finger, I told him: “Oh, it is nothing; it will be all right soon.” And truly, it became all right very soon. But as I had begun working with my broken finger very soon, I felt some pain return from time to time when it rained. I think it was a touch of rheumatism. But that too disappeared quite soon. In the beginning, it was a little stiff when I played the organ, or when I was writing for a long time, but in two months it was all gone. It was just like the other fingers. You see, how wonderful this method is: one is cured immediately….
Well, rest until you are cured. And you need not climb up to see me.
No, Mother, it is not serious and I can easily bear the pain. I’ll come to see You, and it will be a means to be cured faster with Your Blessings.
No, that is no excuse. When one can remain calm and quiet to call down the Peace, then I can work without any hindrance and you will be cured in a couple of days. It is like this: one must try to establish peace and quietness in the body. With this the work becomes very easy. Whatever the circumstances, instead of lamenting and working and being full of dreams of anguish and pain that only increase the misery and are nothing but imaginations and formations of the mind, making things worse — if one knows how to remain quiet and call down the Peace — well, I tell you that you will get cured in one tenth of the time required in ordinary cases or even serious ones. It all depends on your receptivity. You understand, suffering or pain are sometimes necessary. They teach us first to endure, then to turn within to call me so that I may help you to establish the Peace. Basically, it may be a little egocentric, one calls me because one wants to get some relief or be cured. But usually it is always like this, for people look for their own good. Still, they start calling me or turn their feeling towards me — that is what matters to me: they change their consciousness. Anyway, it is the best way to be cured.
You know, a long time ago, when I used to practise occultism and all that… I used to note down everything in a small pocket book, the conversations I used to have during the meditation, the voices that I used to hear, and the occult experiences I had, I used to note them down in this pocket book. And when I came here, I kept it carefully in my drawer. In it there were extraordinary signs, the occult experiences that I had. There were things written at that time which have now become realised prophecies, and exactly what had been written, word for word. But I do not claim that I have made prophesies. In the occult planes it is quite natural to foresee the results that will follow. And it happened exactly as it was written. That is all.
There were also the characteristic signs of the elements that constitute the universe and with these signs I could enter into relation with these elements, and control them as I wished, these elements like Air, Earth, Water, Fire, and then …
Ether, Mother.
Yes, Ether, Ether. But you know all this well! All these elements were under my control, or else all this worked out as I ordered, naturally with these occult signs.
You remember, once we had stopped the rain, there was a torrential rain that would not stop, and we had something very important to do in the playground. You remember?
Yes, Mother, a little.
And then we prayed, and immediately the rain stopped. Another time, we had drawn on the ground a sign that I had shown to call the rain. Like this, we can do many things with these signs.
In this notebook I had also written about the six creations or “pralayas” which are over, and something about this creation, the seventh. There were many other things in it. There was something very important. It was a mantra which could resuscitate the dead. But I don’t find that pocket book. It is lost.
But Mother, You cannot find it? You know well where it has gone. Why don’t You try to find it? It is a loss, then.
Ah, do you know how it happened? It is very interesting how I got this mantra. It happened here. I was doing my yoga, and one day with Sri Aurobindo I entered an occult plane by a secret door, just the two of us. There we saw that one could resuscitate the dead with the help of a mantra. We repeated the mantra together. And then this great secret was with us. And Sri Aurobindo copied it for me in Sanskrit. Together we practised a lot of occultism and we found many beautiful secrets of the world. It was in that pocket book. Naturally, if an ordinary person repeats it, it will have no effect on the dead. It must be a person who has power. It is only He who can command. If Sri Aurobindo repeats it, immediately the dead takes on a new life, but not if any ordinary person repeats it, it will have no effect. It will be a zero for him. That is why I am not worried about the pocket book which is lost, because no one can take advantage of what is written in it. Even if it falls into evil hands, there is nothing to fear, because it is something outside his capacity. One must have this power to put into practice all that is written in it. And there are very important things in it, secrets that have been revealed to me. There is no one who can put it into practice. All the same, I needed that notebook sometimes, to refer to something which I knew was in that notebook, but I did not find it. Unfortunately, it is gone. I tried looking for it, but did not find it anywhere. And then I gave up all hope, saying it is gone for ever. And I am sure it is not stolen by a human being, but a vital being has hidden it. Of that I am convinced, that a vital being has stolen it, so that with all these secrets I do not disturb their authority and their control over these kingdoms.
Anyway, perhaps it is not needed now. That is why it is gone. It is not needed anymore. If it is necessary we will have it.
It does not matter. I do not regret it.
And then, one can have much more by spiritual means which are pure and straight….
Look here, I was in France some, I think, sixty years ago. There was a Frenchman who came back from the Himalayas, who had stayed there some time, and he gave a lecture, and I listened to the lecture, and in the lecture he said that when he was deep in the Himalayas, there was a Sannyasin, whom he didn’t know, who came to see him and told him only this “O—M” and he was completely changed. And then, when he said “O—M”, I felt the same change in me, … as if the Divine was coming in. O—M.
That’s it
Good, good. Keep the secret.
You will recall this: O—M. O—M. That’s all. O—M. It must be manifested. If anything goes wrong, repeat OM, all will go well.
February 1972
(About the significance of OM, the Mother once wrote:)
“the Signature of the Lord.”
…You know, there are not many whom I usually scold; moreover, there are very few who can bear it. And no one can look directly into my eyes when the form of Rudra enters into me. No one. They will be as if petrified. It is very dangerous. It is very rare. Very, very rare that this aspect of Rudra has descended in me. I do not want it because I know the consequences. It can ruin someone, disbalance his life entirely and make him mad. It is very powerful, this aspect — no one can stand before me. That is why I do not like to be harsh, to do things violently in order to bring about a change. With this form, this method of shaking violently, penetrating the consciousness, I could do everything so rapidly. With him there is no compromise — accept, yes; if not, be destroyed.
This is the only method — when I see that the things are going from bad to worse, I have only to take a semblance of this form, not even the form, and things will be arranged as they should be. All the same, I have always this compassion and this love behind, in my consciousness, even during these moments of anger, otherwise it would be a real fire, like a fire which burns everything. I do not get angry so easily, I have a patience which could be stretched, very long like rubber…. I remember, it was once or twice I think …. that this force of Rudra descended in me. It was a very minute part. It had descended in me partially, because at the moment I noticed it descending in me, I refused it….
I usually do not get angry, otherwise it would be the end of the world.
… I know much better what is happening in you, that of which you are not aware, not even a hundredth part. Are you wondering how? Because all that exists, all that moves, comes from me. I know in advance what is going to happen to you, what you have been and what you will be. Everything. For the whole world, for the whole universe … the how and the why, everything, … I know everything because I was there at its birth, and during its development. It is from me and by me that everything exists.
And what are you? Like that, a grain of sand in this whole mechanism. One could say that you do not exist, that you are a minute particle which changes nothing in the world whether you exist or not, you understand? If you have not understood, then go home and remain quiet….
But remember: take each event, each thing that happens as a means given you to make a progress. It is very important. With this attitude you can be sure of reaching the goal.
Well? What is the news? Is everything all right?
No problems?
Well, have you brought something?
Yes, Mother, a letter.
(Mother reads the letter)
Is it a vision which you have seen?
Yes, Mother, it was so beautiful, such perfect forms, such harmonious colours, so lovely and vivid that one cannot express it in words. It was something from far away, something which is not to be found in this world.
(In a teasing tone) But what have you seen of the world? Almost nothing.
Mother, it was so beautiful and peaceful, with the colours which seemed to depict one after another the panoramas, the landscapes, the play of colours, the rising of the sun and much more, evoking in me a sublime joy.
Ah, do not be overwhelmed by too excessive an emotion. It is only the beginning, and nothing special has been revealed. Wait, wait with patience till you fall flat on your face as soon as the mysteries of the other worlds are revealed to you. It is so beautiful, that in comparison, all the rest that you see in the physical world or even the best paintings will seem to you dull and without life. You understand?
Oh! What forms, what beauty, what colours, what movements and what marvels are found in the subtle world. What precision, what exactitude, what variety and what combinations of colours which blend with a fluidity and a splendour of unbelievable beauty. You understand, it is beyond our imagination. One after another, layer after layer, stage after stage, will be revealed in a concrete manner, the revelation of the power of Beauty which instils itself in the heart, the mysteries of these worlds, — not by the vision alone, but by the state of the consciousness which traverses these regions of beauty. It is this and more which one can hardly express in words. It carries you, it seizes you by the multitude of colours, by the similitude of forms, its variety of subtleness, the states of emotion and the profound sentiments. It is living and intense by the sublimity of the spiritual experiences, — it is beyond our comprehension.
These are the expressions of the Divine in His sublime and spontaneous creations, to evoke the joy in His self-expression, the joy to rediscover the Divine hidden in the manifestation.
At each instant it renews itself in its entirety and expresses the joy in His creation. It is not only the beauty but the revelation of His beatitude in His most perfect expression, the outpouring of His infinity of forms, the splendour of His eternal state of consciousness.
It is wave after wave of colours and of forms, rays of light which intermingle in splendid formations, which project images, one after another, and in an instant efface them and reproduce others with an unbelievable beauty — one scene after another, one tableau which replaces the other in a shimmering, — the perpetual outflowing of the revelation of that which is beautiful, divine and pure and which seems to evoke in us the presence of this unvarying Ananda.
These are the experiences of the planes of spiritual consciousness which reveal the splendours that are hidden in the higher worlds.
But when one has this inner vision which opens the doors within our being and one begins to see the truth behind things, then one perceives that even in this material world there are so many things which escape our ordinary sight. Even what one sees under the microscope or through the telescope or what one has been able to reproduce by means of modern photography, are but gropings, the first steps towards the discovery of the secrets of Nature. No man-made machine can describe what lies behind the functioning of Nature. It is so beautiful, so varied, so subtle and so splendid in the perfection of its minute functioning, in its exactitude, that one can never describe it with this puny brain. And man thinks that he can improve upon the works of Nature by means of his machines and his inventions, replace them in a scientific manner by the capacities he has acquired in the physical domain. He has the audacity to believe that he can dominate Nature with his formulas, his modes of experiences and his discoveries which lead towards the conquest of the workings of Nature and its creation. What stupidity, what madness! What a comparison!
He has not even touched the fringes of Nature’s capacity which embraces infinity, and he claims to rule over Nature — the presumptuous vanity of man and his ego, the futile boastings of beings in the grip of an incurable malady which gnaws and consumes their existence.
Poor fellows! But what do they know?
You do not realise what I can do, what I can see, and the formidable power that I possess. But I do not proclaim that I am the Sovereign who dominates the whole universe and the entire Nature, because each one accomplishes his role and the work assigned to him by the Creator for his emancipation — to surpass himself, to rediscover the hidden Divine, for the progression in his effort towards the perfection of his being and his mode of expression. And it is inevitable that each one should play his part, that which has been assigned by Him. Then, why get agitated and try to break this arrangement instead of trying to go beyond by another method which is more direct? It is because man forgets the why, the raison d’être and the aim of his terrestrial existence that he searches blindly, by indirect and inapt methods. It is this that makes him go astray and move further and further away from that which he envisages.
And yet he is keen, determined and has the will to conquer; but he follows a path which may take a long time and many detours to arrive at the goal. But when he understands, when he is guided towards this inner domain where dwells a portion of the Divine, then he will see not only the mysteries of the other worlds with a sense of the Beautiful, the True and the Unique, but also in this world and in Nature, the truth of existence and the means to surpass them: how Nature works, how she creates — how to each one and in each thing she gives a personality appropriate to its character and its mode of existence and plants the seed of progress for its development, for it to blossom fully in its category, in its type and which in its origin is linked to the Divine.
That is why, in each thing in this universe we find that spark of the Divine Light which gives life to all the beings, animate or inanimate. It is this which gives the élan, the power to subsist, to create, to multiply, to recreate, to form and to develop, to blossom towards a new stage, a new light, — all this process which Nature tries out in this creation and launches herself towards new horizons, towards the unknown progress in order to rediscover the Divine who is hidden in each atom. And men seek blindly with machines and by scientific means to find the key to this mystery that is Nature. What ignorance!
All these outpourings — the Divine has given Himself in a self-manifestation in all the creation of this entire universe — vibrate with His presence, are animated by His light, and grow in His love. It is to rediscover Himself in the multitude that He has offered Himself as a sacrifice or as a holocaust. It is an incomparable act, a game, — to lose Himself in the manifestation by His diversity and to find Himself again in the unity of existence … and something more which cannot be expressed. Voilà!
And above all, it is not a blind movement of the Lord. It is equipped and endowed with a precision of unmatched, incomparable perfection, not bound by human logic or its ways of understanding, and certainly not by its ways and its methods. But it follows the logic of the Beyond, of the Infinite, which is supple, plastic and is not bound by any worldly constraint. It is that, and it exists, it acts in full harmony and in a wonderful interdependence of one with the other. And man has the audacity to find it poor, incomplete, something that works badly. Hmm! What does he know! What do men understand! Not even … a thousandth part of what happens; and with childish gesticulations they proclaim loudly all that they believe, see, think and study with their microscopes and their machines, the discoveries and the so-called mysteries they have found by their own effort, and that soon the great secrets of Nature will be revealed, exposed and brought to light so that they can enjoy and take advantage of this phenomenon to become master of Nature, of circumstances and of destiny now that they have the knowledge and a vast scene unfolds — the doors that were closed since the beginning of terrestrial existence are wide open. What a folly!
They have no idea of what one can see, feel, hear and perceive behind all these phenomena of Nature and the Forces which work and animate, create and impel and govern the existence of this whole creation. People are not aware of what I see all around in the atmosphere which surrounds us, — the air that we breathe, the sun and its rays which vivify, give and impart this energy to all things, how the elements work, act and influence all that exists and moves…. The why and the how are no longer mysteries to be solved. For me it is as clear as daylight.
I see with these naked eyes, I hear and I perceive quite naturally, simply by these organs, Nature which constitutes life, the microscopic things, the gigantic and shattering phenomena which sweep and govern entire worlds where men with their inventions and their machines are like crawling insects. In this manner, I see the cells of the body, the molecules and the atoms with their parts and their organisation of specific movements around the nucleus according to the substance which constitutes that element, what varies from one object to another, and the movements which differentiate the materials; I see how these particles in the atoms dance and play with an unbelievable speed to form one element, then another, by a change of varying movements to form another; how the nucleus divides itself; how each element follows an order which is its own according to a rhythm and a definite cadence which characterises its mode, its type and its individuality.
It has perhaps become possible to distinguish and deduce by formulas, and with the help of microscopes of high intensity, to see the movements, and by sensitive instruments to connect and relate the atomic system of things and the molecular constituents, and how the energy propagates, — but only in the rudimentary forms. The scientists have been able to find the effect and the action of some elements, but know nothing of what is happening in the constituents, and how the elements function under a certain pressure and charge to increase the tension and the force which is inherent in each atom. Man does not know the reason and the procedures which determine the sequence of these consequences of the actions of the energy which is hidden within. But I see not only the energies which determine and act — the how and the why of this microscopic substance — but the consciousness which thinks and works in all these mechanisms, their state, their attitude and the will to transform, the aspiration in the atom which wants to unite with the Divine. I see all this, and how they converse among themselves. I hear them, — as I talk with you all, — how the atoms communicate among themselves, how in this dizzy movement of these particles there is no clash at all, neither in this criss-crossing bombardment is there any conflict. All moves so harmoniously and according to a definite order. It is so minute, so tiny, that one does not see it with the naked eye, nor with the machines, nor with microscopes or sensitive cameras. It is the invisible which becomes visible in my vision which has an extraordinary power, — faculties which develop and open up by the spiritual discipline I have practised and acquired.
You see, when one sends me a photograph of someone who wants to come here or anything else, in order to know… I immediately see in the photo his entire personality, the atmosphere which governs him, his attitude, his will to progress, his aspiration and what he can become or realise. All this I see in the photograph, without even seeing this person. In fact, I see his ways, his habits, his thoughts, in short, what he wants. I see his soul; I see his past, his present, his future in an instant, that which one can never see by the human faculties, mental faculties, nor by these miraculous inventions. For this, there must be another development — that which comes by the spiritual and also the occult discipline.
And you know, when I was small, very young, I was spontaneously guided towards this inner discovery, which projected me in a world of beauty, of serenity, of love and peace which I perceived as a dream in comparison to this external world. This world of pain, of misery, of suffering, blindly brutal, and its incomprehensible condition where all culminates in an agonising and endless sadness, — how it gave me a shiver and made me ill. Nevertheless, it has awakened on the earth, in a world of ignorance, the need to relieve the world of this horrible curse and bring to it happiness, joy, peace and a harmony which no power can disturb, no force or movement unsettle. It is this that I used to see, it is of this that I had a tangible experience, and it is this which pushed me, right from my childhood, towards the realisations so much desired and to the pursuit of my dreams, and which has given me indications to find this truth.
When I found this truth, it filled me with a conviction that this could be done only by me and the promise of what awaited me. With the assurance and the courage to pursue till the end, I set out and this is what has been revealed to me, and what I have been able to bring down here — the total realisation of the Supramental and consequently the Supramental manifestation upon earth, and with that the promise of a divine life upon earth. It is this that I dreamt of in my childhood, it is this that I have expressed through all that I have undertaken in the course of my terrestrial existence or else of my entire life. Invariably, it is towards this perfection which reveals the divinity in all things that I launched myself, be it in my studies, be it in my games, in all things that I have done, whether it be tennis or anything else, skipping or cycling or any other sport. I have first found why I do it, the causes, and the effects on me, then the attitude, and the true meaning of that which I had undertaken, and finally the truth which was revealed to me behind these activities. In fact, all, all that I have done, was in the quest of the truth behind everything, the divinity which resides, which acts and drives and expresses the will of the Supreme, the manifestation of the Immanent Divine in each thing, each particle of matter.
It is this, — and how many things have been revealed to me. In all that I have done, tried or attempted in the course of this innumerably diversified life, I have found the One who harmonises all things. Nothing was denied to me, nothing was hidden, left to be surmised; I saw all things in the full clarity, in a perfect illumination of the Divine Beatitude, in accordance with the truth behind the things.
“The Divine Consciousness emerging from the Inconscient”
(A painting by the Mother)
You understand, this divine harmony which governs the world, — to find it, — that was the purpose; and then to participate in order to rise above and to make it work in all the activities that I have undertaken. It was certainly not to know and to express adequately that I studied, neither was it for the joy of sports that I exercised, nor for the pleasure of dancing, nor did I play music to evoke the profound sentiments, nor paint to copy nature or take up art for art’s sake. No, all that I have done, it was in order to find the truth behind these things, behind these appearances, to evoke a soul-state, to express these profoundest aspirations, something that this life hides, which this form must reveal one day — the mystery of this Invisible in the abstract and semi-visible forms. It is this which glimmers in the vaguely-screened light in shapes and forms of my paintings. It is this which I have tried in my paintings, to make a link between the formless and the form, between what is eternal and what is transitory, fugitive, and thereby build a bridge between the finite and the infinite. All that I have painted, it was in order to infuse this harmony from above in a fusion of colours and of light, sometimes by an extravagant vigour, sometimes tender, subtle and diffused, which unfolds itself in splendid forms, unbelievable in their varieties of expressions, by a play of light, the shadows, the shades and the lustres without end which seizes the soul in its immensity and its grandeur. In the drawings, it is not the personalities which I sketched, but the predominance of the soul which emerged.
You see then, I see in a grain of dust all the processes of a macrocosm, of the entire universe, the macrocosm in the microcosm. In the ray of the sun is reflected the panorama of the millions of sparks and the beauty of the splendours of the entire universe. I see in the atom, in the molecules, in a drop of water not only their thoughts and their characteristics but the intuition of the type, the origin of their mode of development, the goal of their existence, the Immanent Divine hidden in things, the joy and the delight that they contain and which moreover give an élan and the urge to rediscover the truth of existence. Man with his knowledge which is still ignorant and poor can never acquire nor know all this in his pursuit of the mastery of exterior domains. This surpasses all his imagination or his dream of becoming master of Nature and of his terrestrial existence.
Wait, wait and you will see, — if you follow this path sincerely, — the reality behind each thing: it is nothing but a blossoming of the Divine in his unfolding to find the Truth hidden in all the things of the universe. This is only the beginning. Do not be carried away so quickly by the small visions and the experiences which are still restricted and stifled by your ignorance and your weaknesses. One must widen one’s consciousness to have the true perception of things, the truth that they contain, the true beauty, the revelation of the Divine in each atom and in each thing in the entire universe. It is this that is really unforgettable, marvellously perceptible in His splendour, in His ecstasy and His Reality. It is this that opens a new sensibility, a new perception in our creation.
What you have seen, … it is rather a new sense — a sense of Beauty.
Yes, Mother, it was so beautiful…
Yes, past experiences are nothing but stages to be crossed on the way towards new horizons full of Beauty, Joy and the Unheard. One perceives the true nature of existence. One discovers the why and the raison d’être of existence, not by the mind and the scientific pursuit, but by the knowledge of the self and the discovery of one’s soul which is all-powerful.
This is the true method for knowing, for understanding and for realising the secrets of Nature, of the universe and the path which leads to the Divine. One can do everything with this realisation, one can know everything and finally become the master of one’s existence. Nothing will be impossible … nothing will be left out. One has only to see with another sense which is within us, develop another faculty by a rigorous sadhana, to discover the secrets of all existence. Voilà.
The means are in you, the path opens up more and more, gets clearer and clearer, and with the help which is at your disposal, you have only to make an effort and you shall be crowned with a Knowledge, a Light and an Ananda which surpass all existence. Whether it be to see the functioning of the atom, or to know the process of thought or the flights of imagination or even the unknown … to know oneself is to know all. It is this that one must find.
This is the work to be done, the goal of our life, the raison d’être of our existence: the Divine who unfolds Himself in His Self-manifestation, in the creation, — in order to rediscover Him in His origin….
Deep Truth in all things
Do You give names to the flowers just like that or else do You see something in the flowers?
All that I do, I do it consciously and in accordance with the deep truth manifested in all things.
February 26, 1951
(Every year, I would go to the Mother on Saraswati Puja day. Once She spoke about Mahasaraswati.)
You know, today is a great day, the descent of Mahasaraswati. She is particularly attached to me and renders me a lot of service from day to day. And I too love her. In each of my tasks where perfection is necessary I receive her invariable help. She comes to help me. And she finds a great joy, because she is occupied with the material progress, the perfection, the harmony and the joy in the work. It is for this that she is near me, to do this or that thing to lighten my work. She is always there to give a ‘helping hand’ so that my work is done as perfectly as possible, and evidently faster. You know, it is in the physical perfection that the work of transformation begins. And it is in an impeccable perfection in material life that the seed of transformation can grow. That is why she is indispensable to begin the process of material transformation. When all around me, and everywhere I look, in the surrounding and near me, she has established a harmony, a peace and a joy in her expression with a dedication and a surrender to belong to me, then, spontaneously, the body absorbs these things in itself and the work of transformation is done much more easily. It is in this way that Mahasaraswati helps me to hasten the work of transformation.
Sometimes, when I have a lot to do and I know that physically it would be impossible to accomplish so many things at the same time, I distribute the work to these gods and goddesses, (moreover there are many of them who are there and they find a great joy in doing something for me), it is like this that I become somewhat free to do my work of sadhana on myself. And among them Mahasaraswati predominates, speeding up all that I have to do. She is very close to me and she knows the reward for rendering a service to me. She is very devoted. The thing that I love the most is that she is a perfectionist of the highest degree and does not ask much in return and she is always on the alert to help me. It is the same with Mahakali, Mahalakshmi and Durga, because they know very well that it is by me that they progress, and they will have as much as is necessary. That is why they have the right attitude. But the other gods, if they do something for me, they are greedy to have something in return. But I know very well what I have to do and neglect no one. Then, you see how all this work gets done, even without my thinking about it. But I keep some work specially for myself, the work of transforming the body, which demands a real effort, otherwise I would be lazy like all of you. (We laugh)
Mother, the gods and the goddesses help You in so many ways…. But for us, You are there, You support us and provide us with all that we need. It is for this, Mother…
Ah! if you knew all that I do for all of you, all that I accomplish, all that I formulate for each one; I arrange, and I hasten the process, I help so that you may progress; I protect you and make you invulnerable to attacks — how much I have to fight constantly so that you are safe and sound; how much I have to stoop or come down to sort out the many forces and powers so that you are protected and well-provided for and that the Good, the True, the Grace and the Divine Love spread over all of you; how much I push you and push you towards the truth of your existence. You know nothing about it! You have no idea! What a privilege, what a marvel! What an opportune moment! So much blessings! So much compassion! Such kindness! Even for the gods I do not do one hundredth of what I do for all of you. And yet they are so happy to have a little bit of what I do for them, even the little that I do is great and vast. Besides, there is no comparison. It is surely not something that can be measured like this, by your laws and your mental norms. In fact, I expect, no, it’s rather, I hope, much, much from you all, much more than the gods. That is why I take so much trouble to lift you all up. Voilà!
This is the moment to take the decision and to embark towards this horizon full of hope, light and harmony. There is nothing else which gives to life this Peace, this Joy, and this Love. My child, my child, do not miss this opportunity, even like the one today, the day of Saraswati Puja, or any other occasion. These are indications, ‘signposts or stepping stones’ to launch oneself towards the Infinite (it could be anything, a word, a series of events, a circumstance, a shock, even an accident,) to be enthused to take the right decision, to turn towards the Divine.
Let us march forward towards this Beauty and this new Light which is beckoning you and inviting you to follow the path of transformation that is already prepared. It is this that has a value. It is this that is worth living for…. Voilà!
Mother, I understand, but how to do it? How to take the first steps? All that we do is annulled so quickly, even by a moment of negligence or of impulsion. How to move forward, how to follow You?
First of all, to will ardently, to aspire to be purified in order to prepare the base. Once the foundation of truth is laid, then I am there to help you further… and yet my help is always there. It acts when you make an effort or you aspire….
(Mother concentrates awhile and then speaks:)
And you know, all these gods and goddesses help me a lot, not only for the terrestrial work, but also on the whole towards a complete accomplishment — such as to maintain Harmony, Peace and Light in the world, as well as in the cosmic and extra-terrestrial planes.
And each time I came down for the ‘Special Blessings’ during the pujas, all the gods and the goddesses accompanied me to have a privileged ‘darshan’ of me and also to participate in what I used to bring down in the terrestrial atmosphere to transform life. There were, naturally, these four Powers like Mahasaraswati, Mahalakshmi, Mahakali and Durga…, but there were so many other gods that I do not remember their names. There were also the gods of the Vedic age and then other gods who were there to be transformed. In fact, there was a crowd before me. One after another they came near me to announce their presence and I greeted each one of them happily. It was truly a sight; especially when I saw Krishna among them. It was charming. And the atmosphere was full of joy and assurance. And each one participated in his way. It was like a manifestation. And today the presence of Mahasaraswati is palpably felt….
If you have an imperious need of perfection, — in your heart, in your actions, in all that you do, even in your attitude, — to be more and more perfect, then be sure that you are under Mahasaraswati’s influence. You must aspire towards this perfection and accomplish it in your daily life. This thirst for perfection should be one of the aims that you pursue, the perfection which strives towards a greater perfection, always progressive, complete, global, with an amplitude and a certitude, more and more vast and infinitely true. The consciousness must turn towards this state or mode which requires and which is satisfied only by the need of perfection, only to find the perfection in whatever we do in life; then it is a solid base for our yoga of transformation. Then one understands the necessity of all that she gives constantly and bestows upon us her full compassion. Otherwise all is lost, dissolved in the atmosphere … like this, (gesture) as it happens constantly with all that the Lord sends to us, without end — this rain of Love, of Light, of Ananda, of His Kindness, of His Compassion and His Grace which is showered constantly…. The whole atmosphere is charged and is flooded from all sides … and no one takes advantage of this great phenomenon. What a loss! What an occasion squandered.
Well, my child, be an exception and you will see the reward.
(The Mother spoke about Mahasaraswati also on another occasion)
You must do everything for perfection. Do everything only for perfection. Find the inner perfection to express the perfection in the physical world. You know Mahasaraswati demands a perfection, a harmony and an exactitude which alone can satisfy her.
January 23, 1966
(From written reply of the Mother:)
If you feel within you an ardent need for perfection in your consciousness and in your action; if nothing short of a perfect perfection can satisfy you, then you can be sure that Mahasaraswati has presided over your birth and that her influence is always with you.
My Blessings
January 30, 1963
(A prayer given by the Mother:)
The perfections of yesterday are no longer sufficient for me. I want to be able to understand and to realise the perfection of tomorrow.
Give me the consciousness that I am nothing, in order to be able to become something.
May 1969
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