Memorable Contacts with The Mother

XVIII: ECLIPSE

Now followed a long period of distress to her body to which the regular attendants alone were witnesses. I would meet Champaklal only at night, and he could give no detailed news either, but there was always in his speech an uncertain tone ending with "Only He can help", or something to that effect. At times he used to be called urgently by Pranab at night while he was taking food or resting and he would rush up.

Dr. Bisht was called at one stage. An electro-cardiogram was taken; other tests also were done, and all the reports were depressing. Still, we hoped, as we had done in Sri Aurobindo’s case. Champaklal kept up his unvarying doubtful tone.

I used to go upstairs every evening and pass some time in quiet concentration at my accustomed place on the terrace. The months rolled on and the August Darshaa was at hand. Speculations were rife as to whether there would be any Darshan at all. But the Mother did appear at the Balcony and we were deeply stricken by what we saw. Instead of elation, a profound sorrow and anguish seized our hearts. It was a sheer act of grace on her part to give us her darshan, which proved to be the last. The condition began to deteriorate from that day. On Andre’s birthday soon after the Darshan it seems she made no response. The attendants kept a vigil round the clock. Night after night Pranab and Champaklal were alternately by her side. From below one could hear Pranab’s voice telling the Mother something or other.

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Arrived 17th November, the fatal day. It was my birthday, too. There was no question of having her darshan, but we could not imagine that things were so serious. Everything went on as usual, even the weekly cinema-show that evening. In the afternoon friends came to wish me ’Bonne Fête’ and I was busy entertaining them, but my mind was not there. As soon as I could make myself free, I went up. I was sitting outside; Kumud opened the door of the Mother’s room and asked me if I could find Pranab and call him. It was about 7 p.m. He had gone out for a short while. He came running. The doctor was also sent for before his usual time. Dyuman who never went up at that hour was also there. So Was Andre. Near about 8 p.m. he came out to go home. His face was grave and calm and bore no indication of disaster. But what about Dyuman or the doctor? What made them stay on and why had Pranab been urgently called back, - these were the questions disturbing my mind. The situation must be critical, I felt. Gautam, a young sadhak who had served the Mother personally, had come from his home to spend the night with us. I was moving to and fro pricking my ears for every little sound, went to bed for a while in Sri Aurobindo’s room as usual and got up at a sudden noise. It was about midnight. I rushed out and saw that Nolini was coming down from the Mother’s room followed by Pranab. Nolini’s face was a mask, but Pranab uttered the fatal words in his grave voice, "Mother has left her body." The shock was too great to bear and the loss too deep to be told.

It was decided that the news should not go abroad at the moment. The body was to be brought down first and kept in the Meditation Hall.

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Pranab carried her in his arms and brought her down to the landing from where some of us helped him carry her to the Meditation Hall. There the Mother’s second couch had been kept ready and the body was placed upon it. It was about 3 a.m. Then the people were informed of the unbelievable painful truth.

The rest of the story is too well-known to be repeated.

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