The letters reveal Nirod's unique relationship with his guru. The exchanges are suffused with a special humour.
Sri Aurobindo : corresp.
Nirodbaran's correspondence with Sri Aurobindo began in February 1933 and continued till November 1938, when Sri Aurobindo injured his leg and Nirod became one of his attendants. The entire correspondence, which was carried on in three separate notebooks according to topics - private, medical, and literary - is presented in chronological order, revealing the unique relationship Nirod enjoyed with his guru, replete with free and frank exchanges and liberal doses of humour. Covering a wide range of topics, both serious and light-hearted, these letters reveal the infinite care Sri Aurobindo devoted to the spiritual development of his disciple.
THEME/S
Today we got the result of M's urine exam. The poor pig died of toxic symptoms. No definite light on the diagnosis.
Alas, poor pig!
August 1, 1935
X is strongly suspected of stealing some ideas from a novel of J, given him for reading. Should he not have avoided it?
Of course he should. But if you knew much of literary and artistic people, you would not be surprised at anything they do.
I advised her to get her book published now with your approval. In that case it has to be done by N, but that will at once wound X who has taken so much trouble to go through the MS.
I have no objection to is doing what is proposed, provided it is not done under my authority. As you can understand, I don't want any farther bust-up in a delicate quarter.
It has really pained me very much. Everywhere the same humanity!
Of course. That's what I have been telling all along. It is not without reason that I am eager to see something better on this well-meaning but woe-begone planet.
August 2, 1935
I was much touched by your last remarks of yesterday... Looking around and at oneself, one heaves a sigh and says—What disciples we are, of what a Master!
As to the disciples, I agree!
And we are to be divinised and made the nucleus of a greater work? My God! No, Sir, I am doubtful about your success; but wish that at least 2 or 3 may be there so that looking at them we may exclaim—By them humanity is conquered! Really, I wish you had chosen better stuff like K.
Yes, but would the better stuff, supposing it to exist, be typical of humanity? To deal with a few exceptional types would hardly solve the problem. And would they consent to follow my path?—that is another question. And if they were put to the test, would not the common humanity suddenly reveal itself?—that is still another question.
August 3, 1935
[Referring to something personal:] You really rescued me yesterday. My humble thanks. Got a few knocks though—
Knocks and shocks are good for the soul, according to some philosophers. Agree?
August 5, 1935
About knocks and shocks, I suppose I have to agree, since you said I have to allow myself to be kicked along. But what about the other philosophers?
The kicking was suggested as a mild stimulant—it could not be included in shocks and knocks. However knocks can help—as man is now constituted—but it is not part of my philosophy, only a viewpoint of experience.
August 6, 1935
J has a swelling of the lower lip; she surmised that it is a hint to stop her from talking too much. When I smiled incredulously, she argued that it was quite possible.
It is possible. It depends on the person and how he or she takes things.
She added that I could ask you if I liked. What do you say about the great hint?
Hints are hints only when you take them—otherwise they are only swellings on a lip.
I send a small poem with Nishikanta's correction. Am I in any way following in his footsteps?
How? Your manner is quite unlike his.
What did you mean by "the poet seems to have come out"? [5.6.35] Forceps delivery can't be more difficult.
He is out—but with difficulty.
A poem of 14 lines taking so many days! Anyway what do you think of it?
My brother Monomohan in his early days would have taken 40 and been surprised at his own rash celerity in writing.
I like it very well.
August 7, 1935
N scorched her hand with hot milk. I think it would be good to keep some picric acid for people dealing with fire-works! It will save them some suffering.
It would be a good idea, but we cannot trust people not to misuse or do mischievous things with it. It would have to be kept shut up under Dyuman's care or somebody else's and so not always available at once.
I suppose you have no time to see my old poem of 80 lines?
After the 15th would be more convenient
August 8, 1935
This morning I lost my temper over N.P.'s obstinacy. He would not listen to my instructions. But can you tell me why I've been feeling a sort of antagonism towards him?
It may be a Dr. Fell affair. "The reason why I cannot tell"—or it may be the result of a feeling of accumulated bother.
August 11, 1935
Well, Sir, have I covered a few milestones on the journey to the Infinite?
Move on, move on!
Some time back you wrote to me: "Never has there been such an uprush of mud and brimstone as during the past few months. However the Caravan goes on and today there was some promise of better things." What about the up-rush of mud? Has it settled down, and are people now floating in the flood of the Supramental?
It is still there, but personally I have become superior to it and am travelling forward like a flash of lightning, that is to say zigzag but fairly fast. Now I have got the hang of the whole hanged thing—like a very Einstein I have got the mathematical formula of the whole affair (unintelligible as in his case to anybody but myself) and am working it out figure by figure.
As for people, no! they are not floating in the supramental—some are floating in the higher mind, others rushing up into it and flopping down into the subconscient alternately, are swinging from heaven into hell and back into heaven, again back into hell ad infinitum, some are sticking fast contentedly or discontentedly in the mud, some are sitting in the mud and dreaming dreams and seeing visions, some have their legs in the mud and their head in the heavens etc., etc., an infinity of combinations, while many are simply nowhere. But console yourself—these things, it seems, are inevitable in the process of great transformations.
I send a poem as an offering—the result of the Darshan.
By the way very much pleased with your offering. Even if he is slow in delivery and his Muse not অনন্তপ্রসবা103 like Harin's or Dilip's or—the poet is undeniable.
August 16, 1935
You say, "I have become superior to it and am travelling forward fast," but you have been always superior and been always travelling fast all your life. How is it going to affect us? [Sri Aurobindo underlined "always superior and been always travelling fast".]
Rubbish!
If my being able to solve the problem of the subconscient in the sadhana is of no importance, then of course it won't affect anybody. Otherwise it may.
From the condition of the people you describe, there isn't much hope left, nor does it show that your travelling fast has speeded them up.
That is of no importance at present. To get the closed doors open is just now the thing to be done and I am doing it. Speeding people through them can come in its own time when the doors and the people are, ready.
What is this mathematical formula that you have all of a sudden found out? Let us have it in a tangible form, if possible...
I told you it was unintelligible to anybody but myself, so how the deuce do you expect me to give it to you in a tangible form?
Chand writes that while he was meditating in a quiet place, he saw a very brilliant mass of reddish light above the temple there. What does it mean?
Don't know. Red means a hundred different things and the particular sense depends upon the shade and the context. If he is getting calm and peace, that is more important.
August 17, 1935
It appears you have made many people happy at this Darshan in spite of their oscillations, sitting contentedly on their mud thrones. My discontented self is one of that happy group!
Well, one can be happy in a swing or even in the mud! The perfect sadhak should indeed be happy in all circumstances, সর্ব্বথা বর্ত্তমানোহপি104 as the Gita puts it.
We wonder and wonder how, all on a sudden, you have melted so visibly, tangibly and manifestly. What is it that could melt you so as to give us 'a patting during darshan?
It is my mathematical discovery—don't seek for any other cause—my grand new, brand-new mathematical formula.
Divine Love concretising itself? or the Divine himself elated at the thought of an impending big deal?
What great expectations! Besides I'm not Roosevelt. I am only going ahead, therefore visibly cheerful though not yet demonstratively exuberant.
But whatever it may be, if you keep up this patting, Sir, at every Darshan, our repinings will disappear. Don't you think so?
Don't know. Provided no sadhak interprets my pattings as blows and cries "Why did you thrash me, Sir?"
August 19, 1935
I am very very happy, Sir—almost floating in Supra-mental bliss. Not only that, I feel you have done, after all, really something this time. Is this happiness an expression of the psychic or of the inner vital?
The psychic of course, with the vital in dependence on it.
What do you think of your namesake, I mean Aurobindo Bose—engineer? I like him very much.
A very fine fellow with much stuff in him and both strong and truly sincere in his spiritual aspiration.
He says that very soon you will be getting 2 to 3 lakhs of rupees and he wants me to get it verified from you.
Let us hope! let us hope! It would be very handy indeed.
I beg to be pardoned for one thing; today Dilipda was saying that he was very happy with this Darshan. I was so moved that I let out the secret of your "travelling forward" fast. Has it been a mistake to let it out?
No—only you must not tell it to too many people. It is only because I don't want speculation or gossip about such things as that spoils the atmosphere.
August 20, 1935
The other night after closing my eyes far a few minutes, when I opened them and looked at the moon, I saw around it a rainbow-coloured circle which again was surrounded by a clouded darkness. Any meaning?
It is a certain kind of subtle physical vision which sees these things. It is not quite easy to say when they have significance or are only things seen. If it had any, it would mean spiritual light with a circle of manifold powers around it apparently in the darkness of the ordinary consciousness.
August 22, 1935
C has sent Rs. 2/- on the occasion of his birthday which is on the 27th. He wants me to do pranam to Mother for him also.
You can do a second pranam (altruistic, for C) on the 27th and Mother will give you a flower for him.
The Darshan atmosphere and its influence seem to be waning away so soon! Old friends or foes are stepping in!
There is always an adverse movement after the darshan, the revanche of the lower forces. I had a stoppage myself, but I am of again riding on the back of my Einsteinian formula.
All poetry gone! Stuck in the sestet of a sonnet. I wonder really when this force will tumble down or will it ever?
You have formed like many poets a bad habit of sticking in the mud between inspired jolts. You have to dissolve the habit—as a doctor you must find out a dissolvent which will do it.
August 23, 1935
You surprise me by your phrase, "between inspired jolts", for most of the poems have been written by halves, quarters, with some intervals and many attempts in between. That is why I can't look upon a poem as having any worth.
Well, if that is not writing by "inspired jolts", what is?
The worth of a poem depends on what has come out, not on the way in which it has come out.
But since a bad habit has been formed, it has to be dissolved. But how? Doctors, you know, are often failures specially in treating themselves. Please, then, prescribe a remedy. It is queer that you write a few lines in no time and the rest perhaps at no time!
This is too cryptic for me. I may say however that inspiration for poetry is always an uncertain thing (except for a phenomenon like H). Sometimes it comes in a rush, sometimes one has to labour for days to get a poem right, sometimes it does not come at all. Besides each poet is treated by the Muse in a different way.
It is proposed to include my poems in an Asram Anthology of Bengali poems. But won't my work look pale and anaemic beside Nishikanta's, all splendour and glow?
No. Besides, there must always be varieties in an anthology which is like a museum or a botanical collection. So a modestum Nirodicum inside will do no harm even beside a flamingo Nishikantica.
August 24, 1935
J is thinking if she could get her book published without any recommendation from others.
I suppose she still needs a sponsor. To take good things on their own merit happens sometimes with magazine editors, but sometimes is not always or often.
See the ways of the world! An honest and good work depends on so many factors even for publication. I suppose it is inevitable in the scheme.
It is the pattern of the scheme. It can only be changed if you change human nature or substitute for it a higher nature.
Any chance of coming out of the mud or the same caravan speed?
What? For whom? Which way?
August 26, 1935
About yesterday's poem, Nishikanta says: "Couldn't your experience—if it is an experience—be expressed in a more subdued way? Have you really heard the "apsara sangeet", in the lyre of the wind?"
It does not seem to me that so much matter of factness can be demanded in poetry. I was not aware of any excessive uchchwas105 when I read it.
G has a disease of which the exact diagnosis you want to know, can be made only by a microscopic examination. He gives a different story altogether, what shall we do?
Can you not say something like this, that you have to make the analysis (or whatever it is called) in order to be sure of your treatment?
August 27, 1935
What do you say to showing G's condition to Dr. Manilal?
You may.
With regard to the publication of J's book, she put my name in the letter she was writing to you. I asked her to strike it out as the reference to me was too short and did not convey my exact idea. She struck it out but said that I was afraid of my name being involved. This is what I got after having done so much!
These are the pin-pricks of life. You must walk warily if you want to avoid them. Beware of dropping pins about—they may prick the dropper. J's resentment at being plagiarised is a pin of importance.
August 28, 1935
Today I shall request you to "stand and deliver" on a different subject. What is exactly the significance of the 24th of November? Different people have different ideas about it. Some say that the Avatar of the Supermind descended in you.
Rubbish! whose imagination was that?
Others say that you were through and through overmentalised.
Well, it is not quite the truth, but nearer to the mark
I myself understood that on that day you achieved the Supermind.
There was never any mention of that from our side.
If you did not achieve the Supermind at that time, how was it possible for you to talk about it or know anything about it?
Well, I am hanged. You can't know anything about a thing before you have "achieved" it?
Because I have seen it and am in contact with it, 0 logical baby that you are! But achieving it is another business.
Didn't you say that some things were getting supramentalised in parts?
Getting supramentalised is one thing and the achieved supramental is another.
You have unnerved many people by the statement that you haven't achieved the Supermind.
Good Lord! And what do these people think I meant when I was saying persistently that I was trying to get the supermind down into the material? If I had achieved it on Nov 24. 1926, it would have been there already for the last nine years, isn't it?
Datta seems to have declared on that day that you had conquered sleep, food, disease and death. On what authority did she proclaim it then?
I am not aware of this gorgeous proclamation. What was said was that the Divine (Krishna or the Divine Presence or whatever you like) had come down into the material. It was also proclaimed that I was retiring—obviously to work things out. If all that was achieved on the 24th [November ] 1926, what on earth remained to work out, and if the Supramental was there, for what blazing purpose did I need to retire? Besides are these things achieved in a single day? If Datta said anything like that she must have been in a prophetic mood and seen the future in the present!
I have stood, but I have not delivered. I had time for standing a moment, but none for a delivery—however pregnant my mind or my overmind may be. But really what a logic! One must become thoroughly supramental first (achieve supermind) and then only one can begin to know something about supermind? Well! However if I have time one day, I will deliver—for evidently with such ideas about, an éclaircissement is highly advisable.
August 29, 1935
Regarding G's disease, Dr. M says... supposing the microscopic exam is negative, we would not be convinced either. So he is almost as positively definite or definitely positive about the nature of the sore, and the cause of it, as you are in your domain... What do you say?
I am not positive about anything—I am simply negative and positively negative about having the nuisance of the damned thing in this state of sanguinary incertitude. As to my personal opinions, I have them but they are very private.
You confess that you have not delivered but in what little you have, there are many points that need a few more lines.
Pin-points?
Yes, an éclaircissement is highly advisable and if you have time, you can do it tonight.
None at all.
But if you have no time I shall have to disturb your Sunday slumber—either by my questionings or by a long poem.
Excuse me. I don't sleep on Sundays; I climb mountains of outside letters which have accumulated for want of weekday time.
You can choose either of the tortures, Sir!
The poem, please!
The "pin" I dropped has caused a septic sore in the pricked!
You can advise her to be Yogic and not mind. Or are you afraid of getting a slap?
I was wondering if it is possible to get J's book published from the Arya Publishing House with your permission.
I suppose they are afraid to venture—being a concern with pinhead profits and no capital to speak of.
August 30, 1935
You say you have your personal opinions about G's case. Surely the person of this "personal" is not Nirod, Khirode or Binode—it is the Divine who is omniscient. Then I don't see why the Divine should seek for data from humans. Human opinion, G will at once question, but the Divine's he can't. Or he can and the Divine is afraid of losing his prestige, what?
If you mean that I can kick G out of the Asram even without assigning a reason, of course I can, and it is not any questioning of his that would prevent it. Usually my very deferent disciples demand an explanation of what I do, and if it is not valid according to human canons of judgment and evidences, they abuse and reproach me in a million conversations and a thousand letters. So to avoid bother, I prefer to act in the human way—bother means frictions, waste of time and paper, vociferations etc.
I couldn't finish copying the poem. Since you "sleep" up to midday, I hear, I can send it to you later.
It depends on the time I go to sleep. If it is at 9 or 10 a.m. I may sleep beyond 12. As for poetry, I see it only at night. There is no time in the afternoon except for the letters.
Nag, the A.P. House manager, told me that they publish books only an your school of thought. But whatever you say they do and will do.
That is the principle on which it was started—that it should not be an ordinary publishing concern. How far the principle has been respected I cannot say, since I don't read all its publications. I don't know whether the Mother will take it up.
Evening
[After a long account of G's uncertain medical case.]
... Please clear this point and don't write Delphic oracles. Leave that to me as my monopoly.
August 31, 1935
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