Evening Talks with Sri Aurobindo

26th December, 1938.

Four disciples were seated on the carpet talking in low whispers at about 5. 30 P. M. One of the group broke into suppressed laughter  in the course of the talk. At 6. 30 P. M. we all assembled by the side of Sri Aurobindo, He looked round and referring to the laughter  asked : "What was the divine descent about?"

Disciple : X. had his usual outburst of laughter.

Sri Aurobindo : Oh, it was the descent of Vishnu's ananda.

Disciple : It is very peculiar how I break out into uncontrolled laughter  so easily. Formerly, I used to weep at the slightest provocation. I think because I live in the external consciousness only I laugh so easily. Is it not?

Sri Aurobindo : It is the reaction of the superficial vital which is touched easily by simple, outward things; there is a child in nature that bursts out like that. It is the same as the Balabhava – the child-like nature. The deeper vital being does not get so easily touched.

The topic was changed at this point.

Disciple : What is meant by self-offering? How to do it?

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Sri Aurobindo : How to do it! One offers one's vital, mind and heart, attachment, passions, and grows into the Divine consciousness.

Disciple : What time is more propitious for meditation, day-time or night-time? I get more concentrated at night.

Sri Aurobindo : It may be due to the calm and quiet atmosphere and also because you are accustomed to it. Nights and early mornings are supposed to be the best for meditation. We ask people to have a fixed time for meditation, for, if they are habituated to it then the response comes at that time due to Abhyas. Lele asked me to meditate twice but when he came to Calcutta he heard that I did not do it. He did not give me time to explain that my meditation was going on all the time. He simply said : "the devil has caught you."

Disciple : Sometimes meditation is automatic.

Sri Aurobindo : At that time you must sit, otherwise you feel uneasy.

Disciple : The other day I was having peace, and ananda, and I saw many visions. But I had to go to sleep, for I thought, if I kept up at night I might fall ill. I saw the flower signifying sincerity in my vision.

Sri Aurobindo : Sincerity means to lift all our movements towards the  Divine.

Disciple : That fear of falling ill by keeping awake, is it not a mental fear?

Sri Aurobindo : The thing is, the physical being has got a limit. The vital being can feel the energy, peace, etc. but

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the physical cannot be taxed beyond its capacity. That is what happened to many Sadhaks here. They overworked till a reaction took place. The force comes for your particular work, not to increase the work and keep it for the other purposes. If you go on overdoing it then the natural reaction will come. There is a certain amount of reasonableness even in spirituality.

Disciple : At one time I also used to feel a lot of energy while I was working with the Mother and I was never fatigued even working day and night, only one or two hours sleep was sufficient and I would feel as fresh as ever.

Sri Aurobindo : Yes. That is because you opened to the Energy. About sleep, even ten minutes of sleep may be enough, but of course, it is not ordinary sleep but going within. If you can draw the Force with equanimity and conserve it, these things can be done. As I said many Sadhaks felt that sort of thing when we were dealing with the vital. But when the Sadhana came into the physical there was not that push any more and people began to feel easily fatigued, lazy, and unwilling to work. They began to complain about ill-health due to overwork and were helped by the doctor. Do you know the idea of "H?" He says people have come here not for work but for meditation.

I dare say if we had not come down into the physical and remained in the vital and mental like other Yogis without trying to transform them then things would have been different.

(At this hour Mother came in and we meditated for sometime. After she went away, our talk was resumed. Someone remarked N. had a good meditation. He did not know that Mother has gone.)

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Sri Aurobindo : Good meditation?

Disciple : How do you know?

Sri Aurobindo : By the inclination of your head, perhaps.

Disciple : I can't say; I was having many incoherent dreams and visions – that is all I can say, perhaps it was in the surface consciousness.

Sri Aurobindo : Surface consciousness of the inner vital being. Such things are very common; of course, when one goes still deeper one does not see them. There is a point between the surface consciousness and the deeper vital which is full of these fantasies and dreams. They are apparently incoherent. In the physical a mouse turning into an elephant may have no meaning but it is not so in the vital. They have no coherence of the physical plane but they have their own coherence of the vital plane. But when one gets the clue one finds that everything is a linked whole. That I have seen many times in my own case. It is this world from which Tagore's painting came, – what Europeans call the Goblin world.

Disciple : Does Tagore see them before drawing them?

Sri Aurobindo : I do not think so. Some see them but do not draw them. But they come to him. Anybody who has the least experience of these planes can at once say from where they come.

Disciple : But how is it that people think and he himself calls it great paintings?

Sri Aurobindo : Everybody calls it "great and wonderful", so he himself comes to think it so.

Then we began to talk about headache either due to physical cause or resistance.

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Disciple : I have seen many times my headache start after Mother's touch at Pranam.

Sri Aurobindo : That may be because you passed from one state of consciousness to another.

Disciple : Unconsciously?

Sri Aurobindo : Why not? When from a state of concentration you mix yourself just after the Pranam you can easily pass to another state. That is why Mother advises people to remain calm and quiet for some time after Pranam or meditation.

Disciple : I felt once as if the head were suspended in the air and that parts of body did not resist.

Sri Aurobindo : That is separation of the mental consciousness.

Disciple : Are you able to know what experiences Sadhaks are having, especially if they are some decisive ones?

Sri Aurobindo : I don't. But Mother knows. Whenever it is a question of consciousness she can see in the Sadhak whatever changes are taking place. When she meditates (with the Sadhak) she can know what line he is following, the line she indicates or the Sadhak's own and afterwards what changes have been brought about in the consciousness.

Disciple : And when the Sadhaka experiences something, is it imparted to you?

Sri Aurobindo : What is the use of giving our own things to them? Let them have their own growth. I may put in a Force for people who are in habitual bad condition, people who are always going in the wrong and try to work it out so that the condition might improve. If the

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Sadhak co-operates then it is comparatively easy. Otherwise, if the Sadhak is passive then the result takes a long time, it comes, goes again, returns like that and ultimately the Force prevails. In case of people like "X." we used to put in a strong Force then he became lucid and then the whole vital used to rush up and catch hold of him. Whereas if the Sadhak actively participates then it takes only one-tenth of the time.

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