At the feet of The Mother and Sri Aurobindo

14 June 1936

MYSELF: When I perceive that I should tell you something but there is an unwillingness on my part, I force myself to let you know so that your light and force can descend on that part. Is this forcing a mental action? Even though there was a desire to hide before telling, yet after telling, satisfaction and relief are the result in spite of the action having been forced.

SRI AUROBINDO: It is quite all right. It is not a mental rule, but comes from the psychic being.

MYSELF: Mother Divine, there was another discussion about mind somewhere else, especially about your asking us to reject mental movement. I won’t write to you all that I felt and said. Here I am putting only a little bit of it.

I can feel what is the real function of the mind. And I feel that what generally people call mind or intellect is only the movement of the physical mind (because only the physical mind creates doubts — is it not so, Mother?) not the clear passive and silent mind or the higher or intuitive mind which can be the true expression of the higher things and the seat of knowledge. When you discourage mental movement it is, I feel, this limited physical mind’s obscure and doubt-creating movement. Am I right?

SRI AUROBINDO: You answered extremely well.

MYSELF: I am writing to Sri Aurobindo on control of speech: “I can’t make any progress in this respect. At every step I feel its necessity, but I can’t carry it out rightly. As a result, many unpleasant and undesirable things happen causing mental friction and one has to pay a heavy price for it, especially during a discussion. Yet, how to save myself and others? Will you show me the way which I can follow to learn the true method of control? Please grant me this prayer.”

SRI AUROBINDO: ...It is quite certain that these discussions are often a source of friction and misunderstanding.

Perhaps what might be the best from the point of view of sadhana is to use these occasions... as occasions of psychic self-training and the overcoming of things that in the matter of speech stand in the way of a complete harmony between the inner consciousness and the movement of the outer being.... Apart from that, the self-control that is desirable in these surroundings and in the midst of discussion would mean among other things:

1) Not to allow the impulse of speech to assert itself too much or say anything without reflection, but to speak always with a conscious control and only what is necessary and helpful.

2) To avoid all debate, dispute or too animated discussion and simply say what has to be said and leave it there. There should also be no insistence that you are right and others wrong, but what is said should only be thrown in as a contribution to the consideration of the truth of the matter.

3) To keep the line of speech and wording very quiet and calm and uninsistent....

4) Not to mind at all if the others are heated and dispute, but remain quiet and undisturbed and yourself speak only what can help things to be smooth again.

5) If there is gossip about others and harsh criticism (especially about sadhaks), not to join — for these things are helpful in no way and only lower the consciousness from its higher level.

6) To avoid all that would hurt or wound others.

Perhaps you have tried to do these things already; if so, then see how far you have been successful and perfect the self-control.

In spite of it if anyone misunderstands or feels offended, then there is no help for it.

(14.6.36)