Living in The Presence

Longing For Pondicherry

August of 1942 was around the corner. Ma called Dada and said, "I would like to go to Pondicherry for the darshan." It was decided that my second brother Robi would accompany Ma this time. But I too wanted to go to Pondicherry, I went on insisting. I kept repeating this to Ma. I was not even nine then and going to school. Baba refused to let me miss school in order to go to Pondicherry. He was a stern man and once he made up his mind he was inflexible. It was simply impossible to make him change his decision. Day and night, I kept pestering Ma about my desire to go to Pondicherry. We were at the beginning of July. Ma and my second brother Robi had to write a letter to the Mother seeking permission to go. I went to Baba and holding his hand, pleaded, "Baba, I want to go to Pondicherry with Ma." Baba was getting ready to go out and did not answer. He went out of the room and began scolding  Ma, "You are the one spoiling this girl! This little girl no older than nine wants to go to Pondicherry 1300 miles away! She is not bothered about school or her studies, she just wants to go to Pondicherry!" And saying this he angrily walked out. I ran up to the second floor terrace and began to cry.

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